Oh boy, here we go. I was not expecting “Pet Sitter Pat” so soon, and let me just say that I am not looking forward to rewatching it. Because there’s no question that I will dislike this episode. The question is, how much will I dislike it? Tolerable-tier? Bad-tier?
Abysmal-tier?? It could honestly be any, but only one will prevail. I do think people take this episode too seriously though, so let me make it clear that my qualms with the episode don’t center around “animal abuse”. Though, in a way, that is one of my issues.
An episode like this doesn’t deserve to use such good title card music as
Coconut Cream Pie (actually, a lot of the music in this episode is really good, so at least the episode is good from an audio standpoint). It makes me feel too optimistic for what’s to come. Not to mention that Gary is all in the title card too, so I’m excited because as everyone knows, that’s my favorite little guy. At least this episode gets right into the thick of things quickly, I can always appreciate an episode that doesn’t dally, at least when the dallying is boring. And I like that we get an appearance of SpongeBob’s Grandma in this episode, it’s been a while. And I like SpongeBob’s immediate concern over finding someone to watch over Gary. We then spend some time with SpongeBob trying to get other people to watch over Gary for him, starting with Squidward, which is where the “I Was a Teenage Gary” similarities really come through. Gary’s lack of remorse for eating Squidward’s kelp garden is great, because why should he be remorseful…a snail’s gotta eat! Gary can do no wrong in my eyes. The episode then abandons the rule of three structure I was expecting as the next candidate is Patrick. Which I mean, it does make sense that SpongeBob would ask his neighbors first, but I think this episode might have worked better if SpongeBob already had trepidations about Patrick watching over Gary, but the guy was the only available person he knew.
Well, anyway, SpongeBob asks Patrick to take care of Gary, handing him over to the starfish, and guess what Patrick does immediately? I’m sure you’ll never get it. He drops Gary unceremoniously while saying that Gary will be safe with him. And yes, I know that this is supposed to be a joke, but unfortunately said joke isn’t funny to me because it’s extremely predictable and hurting Gary doesn’t work for me and just makes me worried about what I’m getting into here, because are we really going to see an entire episode of Patrick abusing an animal? Luckily Gary is an anthropomorphized animal, so it’s much easier to swallow, but he’s still a pet, which is very much emphasized in this episode. And I think my biggest reason for why seeing Gary hurt is so much worse than other characters is because, for the most part, he can’t really fight or talk back, so it’s just kinda more difficult to watch in that way. This is of course fiction, but that doesn’t automatically make this kind of thing easy to watch.
Why SpongeBob has any faith in Patrick considering he watched Gary be dropped in front of him, and saw Patrick completely ignore Gary’s list of needs, I have no idea. I suppose Patrick did do some work to convince him too, but not very much. I want to hold onto SpongeBob’s care for Gary in this episode, because it’s clearly there, especially later, but this critical oversight makes SpongeBob’s attitude in this episode internally inconsistent. Well…maybe it can be explained by SpongeBob only wanting to see the best in Patrick, so he’s looking over these qualities of him, but then that implies that SpongeBob privileges his friendship with Patrick over the safety of his pet. And I’d rather the episode just stay away from making these kinds of comparisons rather than try to answer them, as either answer will be bad for someone lol.
I’ll go ahead and explain this here, but one thing I do actually appreciate out of this episode is that, for the most part, Patrick is not malicious at all. This episode is actually an improvement over “Dumped” in that way (though there are some moments, which I will of course be explaining later). Patrick is just extremely stupid in this episode, which while better than maliciousness by a country mile, is not very entertaining for me either. I’m fine with stupidity, I really am, but I’ve never really liked when Patrick’s stupidity ends up hurting other people in such a…pointed way. Like I’m fine when it happens once or twice in an episode, but when it repeatedly hurts one character it’s kind of annoying (”Stuck in the Wringer” says hi).
Once SpongeBob leaves, the episode starts on a pretty slow decline, so I can at least give the episode that, it doesn’t go straight into awfulness. Yet. Patrick, despite being literate, reads the list of things to do upside down and doesn’t think to maybe try turning the list a different way to try and read it, because anyone who is literate would know that the list is upside down. At this point, they should just make Patrick literally illiterate if they’re going to do that. And this episode also does that thing where they make Patrick smug and condescending towards SpongeBob, which is something I have quite literally never liked since I first saw it in “Dumped” (and what a coincidence that this episode is about Patrick and Gary, huh?). Patrick suggests taking Gary for a walk, which actually seems to be the right move as Gary is excited, but then Patrick ends up getting nauseous from the coral balls he ate, so he doesn’t take Gary on a walk after all. Well, there goes all my hopes for this episode not being insanely predictable in a bad way.
At least we get a gorgeous background before moving onto the next scene, that always cheers me up. Patrick, somehow, spends literal hours inside the bathroom, and he returns to an emaciated Gary. You’ll never guess what happens next. If you guessed that Patrick completely neglects to feed Gary, despite Gary’s clear instructions to him, and feeds himself with Gary’s food, then you’d be right! Please show me where the
funny joke is. Because I see the joke, but I’m not laughing. And perhaps I am taking this too seriously, but I mean…I don’t find it funny, what am I supposed to say?
Thankfully, the scenes at SpongeBob’s grandma’s house are much better than anything happening at the pineapple. Well, maybe not much better...It’s not unfunny, let’s put it that way. And I do like that SpongeBob’s love for his snail is a known fact at least. But this of course only causes SpongeBob to get really worried about Gary, which is again that inconsistency I said earlier, because if he’s this worried about Gary and cares this much about him, why is he leaving him with Patrick of all people? This inconsistency becomes especially apparent when SpongeBob literally thinks of Patrick dropping Gary earlier, and
then gets worried…like why weren’t you worried the second that happened??? It’s almost like this episode had a different, better plot earlier of SpongeBob actually having no reason to worry until he thinks of some throwaway line Patrick said or something. That wasn’t explained well…probably like most of this review lol, sorry. And when SpongeBob calls Patrick on the phone, Gary literally cries for help into the thing, but sadly SpongeBob interprets it as laughter. Thankfully, it’s actually reasonable for SpongeBob to interpret it this way (unlike
certain interpretations made in a
certain episode about SpongeBob and his snail), at least if we assume that Gary’s laughter and cries of agony sound the same lol.
For as much as I’m clearly being negative here, you know I’m actually surprised by how much I don’t hate what I’m seeing. Now, I don’t like it, let’s be clear, but so far my hatred (I can’t even call it that…strong dislike is a better phrase) is nowhere near the level of “A Pal For Gary” or “Stuck in the Wringer”. I’m just…irritated and tired because how many times do I need to ask “how is this supposed to be funny” before someone gets the hint? I really do think that when episodes are being devised, that question needs to be asked for every joke. If it can’t be answered well, the joke’s gotta go. Though I also know I’m the type of person who likes explaining jokes, and I know jokes are better when they’re not explained. But I think explaining jokes in the writers room is a necessary step. But that’s just me.
Finally, Gary has enough of Patrick’s idiocy, and starts attacking Patrick in what is probably the most entertaining part of this episode so far. And then Patrick annoys me to the line of actual anger when he gets rude with SpongeBob when SpongeBob tries to remind him of how to bathe Gary. Like boy you are being a horrible pet sitter and you dare catch an attitude with SpongeBob, whose pet
you are sitting? Take several seats. At least I’m rewarded with Patrick getting smacked in the head with the phone receiver. Patrick then tries to lure Gary into the bath with a FLAMETHROWER…honestly I had a startled bark of laughter at that one, because what??? If the episode had been this ridiculous the entire time, I might’ve actually liked it more. Unfortunately, this little bit of fun ends when Gary runs away and Patrick comes in with a hose and a much less funny imitation of “Gary Takes A Bath”. Gary gets battered some more, which is about as unpleasant as you’d think, and then we finally get to the actual chaos ending of the episode (because we’ve already had like…2 other chaotic moments), as Patrick ruins SpongeBob’s house through his stupidity.
The last minute or so of “Pet Sitter Pat” had the potential to save this episode, had they not been completely nonsensical. It all starts when SpongeBob calls Patrick again, and for some reason Gary and Patrick are now…having a good time? What happened between Patrick hosing and drying Gary and them swimming in a whirlpool in SpongeBob’s house for them to start laughing together? I get that it’s supposed to be a companion joke to the one earlier, where SpongeBob mistook Gary’s crying for laughter, and now he’s mistaking the laughing for crying, but like…it doesn’t make sense. And this is how I feel about the rest of the episode, because SpongeBob goes to save Gary, and he finds him…reading Patrick a bedtime story??? I’m lost. When did they become friends?? Like this isn’t even because I don’t like the episode, but I’m legitimately confused because this does not follow from
anything we saw earlier, it’s like we’re missing a scene. And the thing is, all we needed was one single scene to save both this writing mistake, and potentially the episode. And the scene is this: have Patrick realize what he’s done wrong and sincerely apologize to Gary, who then forgives him. Then have SpongeBob’s phone call and have the rest of the episode play out the same way. You see how this improves things? It gives Gary actual justice, it connects these two disparate plot threads together seamlessly, and it makes what we’re watching actually satisfying. But without this scene, or anything like it, I feel left-footed because of this narrative whiplash, and upset because I lack catharsis and Patrick getting his comeuppance.
“Pet Sitter Pat” is simply an unpleasant episode that could’ve been better in such a simple way. I don’t really hate it, but I would never watch it of my own volition. It’s just kind of a mess of an episode from a writing standpoint, and that’s not too far off of a way to describe it from an enjoyment perspective as well. There are a couple good moments here and there, but for the most part I did not like what I was seeing at all. There’s no catharsis, no enjoyment, no fun, and I can already think of 3 different ways this episode could’ve been better. That’s not good. The only thing I’m stuck debating on is whether this episode contains the “ew” factor needed to bump it down to Abysmal. This could be surprising to some reading, but I’m thinking no. I don’t like this episode, to be clear, but I just don’t have the same visceral reaction to it as I have to “A Pal For Gary”, “Someone’s in the Kitchen With Sandy”, “Choir Boys”, and “Stuck in the Wringer”, AKA the only Abysmal-tier episodes thus far. But the writing of this episode is for sure on par with those. Legitimately some of the worst writing I’ve seen from this show, and I don’t say that lightly.
Episode Tier: Bad
Episode Score: 3.4/10