Make Me Laugh Competition (REVIVED)

[President Squidward]

Yeah I know I didn't finish this last time, but I swear this time I'll look at all the jokes and rate them. Also, I'm just going to give you a score of 1-10, not in emotes, just the plain number. First one to get to 100 wins the round and gets 1,000 doubloons from me.

RULES:

1. Only tell one joke per time to make it more fair, you can tell another joke after I grade yours.
2. I'm very picky on jokes so don't tell me predictable jokes plz.
3. Don't post a picture or video, those won't qualify.

Now let's see if these newer members who weren't here for the first topic have some humor. Tell away!

Please keep the humor in forum rules as well.

 

[DigitalDeathstraction]

Did you know Abe Lincoln was Jewish?

He was shot in the temple.

 

[Big Meaty Claws]

I AM A CAR
I AM-

I HAD A VOICE CRACK
::dolphin noise:: MY VOICE CRACKED
EUH IM A HORRIBLE RAPPER
EUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEE

 

[The Real Nostalgia Critic]

Dear SSJ, I hate sticky fluids (hands) on my child-sized weiner and Elmyra's

 

[ScumBob]

Halibut's new name

 

[President Squidward]

Did you know Abe Lincoln was Jewish?
He was shot in the temple.

dont get it :P, 2

I AM A CAR
I AM-

I HAD A VOICE CRACK
::dolphin noise:: MY VOICE CRACKED
EUH IM A HORRIBLE RAPPER
EUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEE

funny, but I don't want to take quotes from videos so 4

Dear SSJ, I hate sticky fluids (hands) on my child-sized weiner and Elmyra's

2

Halibut's new name

1

BMC: 4
Digital: 2
OMBF: 2
Cob: 1

 

[BobCarotte]

hurr

 

[DigitalDeathstraction]

How do you find a blind guy at a nude beach?


It's not hard.

 

[Sunshine Banjo Face]

What is something all Red Sox Fans have in common? A Closet Inferiority Complex shown through television broadcasting.

 

[President Squidward]

How do you find a blind guy at a nude beach?
It's not hard.

There we go! 7

What is something all Red Sox Fans have in common? A Closet Inferiority Complex shown through television broadcasting.

3

Digital: 9
BMC: 4
Trophy: 3
OMBF: 2
Cob: 1

 

[DigitalDeathstraction]

I don't always tell dad jokes, but when I do he laughs.

 

[The Real Nostalgia Critic]

I was thinking about selling candles with drawings of pearl harbor on them but I didn't want to make light of a tragedy.

 

[SpongeRoadie UK]

How do you make a 5 year old boy cry twice?

Use his teddy bear to wipe & clean his bloody butt.

Spoiler

And your bloody wiener, too. And his semen filled lips.

 

[ScumBob]

How do you make a 5 year old boy cry twice?

Use his teddy bear to wipe & clean his bloody butt.

Spoiler

And your bloody wiener, too. And his semen filled lips.

And Elmyra's

 

[DigitalDeathstraction]

How do you make a 5 year old boy cry twice?

Use his teddy bear to wipe & clean his bloody butt.

Spoiler

And your bloody wiener, too. And his semen filled lips.

JFC dude thats hilarious

 

[BooBooKeys]

What's Bill Cosby's favorite restaurant?

Rudy Tuesdays.

 

[President Squidward]

I don't always tell dad jokes, but when I do he laughs.

3

I was thinking about selling candles with drawings of pearl harbor on them but I didn't want to make light of a tragedy.

4

How do you make a 5 year old boy cry twice?

Use his teddy bear to wipe & clean his bloody butt.

Spoiler

And your bloody wiener, too. And his semen filled lips.

too dark XP, 3

What's Bill Cosby's favorite restaurant?

Rudy Tuesdays.

3

Digital: 12
OMBF: 6
BMC: 4
BBK: 3
Roadie: 3
Trophy: 3
Cob: 1

 

[BagelsinEurope]

hey prez can you please give me a 10 i wanna win this i'm your good friend hey prez can i just have 10 points please i'm your best friend you don't know anyone else on sbm who is as nice as i am so as a reward i should get a 10/10 c'mon prez i'm your favorite son give me a 10 i did my chores i want a 10 please if i win this i'll say thank you as a token of my appreciation but i need you to give me a 10 first so can i please have a 10 prez? you know you want to

 

[Luray]

a couple weeks ago, i inveted a friend of mine over to my house to just chiil. i barrely knew him, but he was sorta poor and didnt speak perfect english, i sorta felt bad for him, so i decided to invite him over, he was playing Pokemon sun and moon while coming to my house, he just caught a rare shiny, this filled him with pride. he then stopped in his tracks, face white. being very religous, he realized pride was one of the seven deadly sins. meanwhile, i shoot him a text, wondering where he is"

"Hey Man, u coming soon?"

"Here i come, i am sin a mon"




i better ::dolphin noise:: win this ::dolphin noise::

 

[The Real Nostalgia Critic]

What's Bill Cosby's favorite restaurant?

Rudy Tuesdays.

Bill Clinton walks into Bill Cosby's favorite restaurant.

He asked Bill if he wanted to join "Bill Clinton's Gentlemen Club".

And he responded, "Sure".

Now together, they're Bill & Bill.