Looking Back: My Bottom 60

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This idea came to me pretty recently when I was looking through some of my older posts.

If you don't remember, almost four years ago, I made a bottom 60 topic. Here's the link if you want to read it: https://www.sbmania.net/forums/topic/35417-charles-bottom-60-episodes-as-of-currently/?st=0 Do be warned, however. These reviews are very cynical and clearly a product of their time (2013-2014, when being cynical about SpongeBob was pretty much a requirement on the internet.) I also already found a flaw: My name is actually not Charles. I simply used it because I wanted to keep most of my essential information private.

However, my point isn't to repeat the list or anything. I want to look back at these reviews and see if they're good or not. I remember most of these being overly angry (again, product of their time. However, I haven't read any of the reviews since I first wrote them. I'm going to look back and see how well they hold up.

If you dislike overly cynical reviews of this show, I suggest skipping past the review and seeing the other sections, where I talk about the review and my thoughts on the episode at this current point in time, as well as mention if it would be on the list today. Even if I still dislike the episode, I'll be talking about them more maturely than I most likely did four years ago. However, I suggest reading the review so that you better understand my points.

To give you an idea of the format, I'm going to show the first review I'll be looking over.

"#60


Season: 6
Episode: 101a
Airdate: June 6, 2008

Now, I place this low on the list because it's not that offensive of an episode.I still mostly enjoyed the episode, but why is it on here?

In the beginning scene, Squidward is seen watching House Fancy.
Squilliam is shown showing his house, because his house is fancy, and fancy, and fancy, an- zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. What happened?

So then, Squidward tells Squilliam that his house is fancier, and Nicholas comes right away. Squidward tries to one-up Squilliam. SB is caught spying on Squidward, and Squidward says Spongebob can help.

Then, Spongebob gets paint on everything. Squidward tries to move stuff, and this happens:



What the heck is up with this? It's so distracting and keeps your mind off the rest of the episode. Then, the vacuum starts sucking everything up, and Squidward's house explodes. Squidward wins.

Although the episode itself is decent, it could of been better without it being boring, and that scene.

Least Favorite Character: Spongebob
Least Favorite Moment: That picture
Least Favorite Quote: "Aaagh!" -Squidward

Hint for 59: We have to save that person."

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

Does anyone else notice how oddly this review is structured? I don't go into much detail about the plot, aside from mentioning certain plot points and throwing in a stupid joke about how boring the episode is. Did I really need that many Z's? Because of how short my thoughts were, I'm wondering if that joke was used to pad out the length of the review.

I also have that weird sentence about Squidward telling Squilliam his house is fancier. Yeah, no, he told Nicholas that, not Squilliam. The rest of this weirdly short paragraph does nothing to describe the conflict of the episode. Not once do I mention that Squidward needs to revamp his house. Granted, you've likely seen the episode if you're reading the review, but I still should've gone into better detail.

Not to mention that other moments are forgotten by me. Granted, this episode isn't very memorable (aside from the toenail scene and the ending,) but after I react to the toenail scene, I skip right to the vacuum part, instead of mentioning SpongeBob's brain, Patrick, or the death of Squidward's toilet. It really does feel like I tried to write a review as quickly as possible. In fact, that's likely what the issue here is. Notice how short it all is? No one wants to read a review that's short and not descriptive.

Oh, and "Squidward wins." Again, way to describe the actual episode in detail, past me.

I also say "could of" instead of "could've." One very glaring detail about my older reviews you'll notice quickly is that my grammar was horrible back then.

On a more positive note, however, I wasn't overly angry in this review. Then again, it's only #60, and House Fancy is more boring than frustrating, but at least the first review here isn't super cynical.

Does this review hold up? Not really. When it comes to being overly angry, I did a good job at not doing that, but this review is not descriptive and so short that it feels as though I threw it together in a few minutes. It wouldn't surprise me if I did.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

If you can't tell, House Fancy, in my opinion, is an episode that is very middle of the road. Aside from the toenail scene (which is really disgusting and wasn't needed,) and Squidward winning (which wasn't expected by me upon initial viewing and was a nice change of pace,) this episode isn't very interesting. I'd say it's decent.

Would this episode be put on the list if it were made today? Probably not. If the episode is more boring than anything else, and there's nothing that makes me super angry, I can't say that the episode deserves to be called the 60th worst one in my opinion. So yeah, it's off the list.

That's how these reviews are going to go. I'll post #59 as soon as possible.

But wait! It turns out I added a new #60. Here it is: (The title card is broken, but it's supposed to be the Slumber Party.)

"The NEW #60


Season: 6
Episode: 110a
Airdate: November 28, 2008

I actually originally had the plot filled out, but I accidentally backspaced and erased my data, so I'll just leave this here:

All Pearl does is whine and complain. She throws a slumber party, ruins Mr. Krabs house,

Least favorite character- Pearl
Least favorite moment- The beginning and the end
Least favorite quote- Pearl whining and complaining (shut up before I skin you, kill you, and eat you for dinner you stupid whale)

I will post 55 tomorrow."

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

And I thought my review of House Fancy was pretty bad. THIS makes that review look like Roger Ebert's skills. THAT'S saying something.

First of all, I tell everyone that I don't have a plot filled out because I "backspaced and erased my data." That's a terrible excuse for making a review like this. Instead of putting effort into the review and trying to describe it, I leave two sentences (one of which seems incomplete.)

Not to mention that I complain about Pearl's role here. She is snobby, yes, but it doesn't last that long in the episode, so why I'm focusing on that more than anything else makes little sense. Then again, writing this bad a review doesn't make much sense, either.

Also, look at that least favorite X part. In my House Fancy review, it was obvious what the issue was, so my lack of extreme detail in the least favorite X parts was fine. In a review like this, though, I'm confused. What did I not like about "the beginning and the end?" It's never explained by past me, so I'll never know what made me hate it. The least favorite quote doesn't even feature a quote, but just shows something that generally happened in the episode. Not to mention the "skin you, and kill you, and eat you for dinner, you stupid whale" part. Ignoring the hilarious grammatical mistake (I forgot a comma after "dinner,") this is the first sign of me being overly aggressive and cynical in my reviews. Gosh, this is awful.

Does this review hold up? HECK NO. I really hope none of my other reviews in this topic are like this. This was terrible, and no human being should ever be forced to read it.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

This episode is rather good, in my current opinion. Pearl's snobbishness isn't that annoying to me anymore, and the rest of the episode is good. I like the irony in what happens in the episode. Mr. Krabs doesn't want boys at the party despite trying to smuggle a boy into it, and Mr. Krabs' worries about his house being destroyed come true only because of his own plans, among other parts. This episode even feels similar to No Weenies Allowed, with SpongeBob trying to enter the house (even using the doppelganger gag again.) While I think that episode is far superior over this one, this one's still pretty good.

Would this episode be put on the list if it were made today? Nope. Whereas I'm not sure if House Fancy would be here or not, this episode definitely isn't going on the list. Parts of it did make me laugh, and the episode has an interesting plot that is hinged on some hilarious irony. So, yeah, it's definitely off the list.

That was pretty long, wasn't it? Either way, I think this will be a good idea for me. While most of my older reviews are bad, I have a feeling that I'll eventually find one that holds up really well today. That's one of the points of this topic, after all (the other being to criticize most of the reviews.)

I'll post my thoughts on my #59 review tomorrow.
 

Honest Slug

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Interesting idea and good explanations.

In my opinion House Fancy is okay. There's some unfunny stuff but it's pretty watchable and the story is at least somewhat interesting.

I actually think The Slumber Party is a really good episode and along with Krabby Road and Chum Bucket Supreme are some of the few genuinely funny episodes of season 6.
 
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Here's #59.

"#59


Season: 7
Episode: 138b
Airdate: February 6, 2010

This episode is so stupid.
In this episode, Spongebob and Patrick go to Sandy's place, and Sandy karate's them because of a ninja sneak attack? What! What the heck is that about?!? Anyway, Sandy gets a letter from her cousin that she has to go to some rodeo or something along those lines. She sings a god-awful song about it, and goes to Texas.

For the longest time, nothing happens.

(dreams about classic episodes)
Wet Painters
Nasty Patty
Frankendoodle
(end dream)

Then, they rip off Pressure (which I posted on my top 117 yesterday), and then... Well, forget it.

This is one of the most stupid episodes ever.

Least favorite character: SB
Least favorite moment: the song
Least favorite quote: "Ninja sneak attack" -Sandy

Hint for 58: Reading someone's personal stuff"

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

Apparently the idea of her ninja sneak attack confused me beyond belief. Don't get me wrong, that joke wasn't funny, but why I'm acting so confused about it doesn't make much sense to me.

This review was pretty bad as well. I admit that I stand by much of what I said here, with the episode being boring, having very little substance, and the ending being a rip-off of a much better episode, but the way I describe it here just doesn't work well.

I also call the song god-awful. This is clearly a poor choice of words on my part. The song itself is good, but what I hate about it is the visuals that go with it. Those live-action cows look terrible, and not in a funny or stylistic way, either. I also mention that nothing happens for the longest time, and fall asleep while dreaming about classic episodes. How original. It's totally not like I stole that joke from MoBrosStudios or anything.

In fact, I remember that being a common problem. Let's make a counter to count how many times I steal a joke or quote from another reviewer.

REVIEWER IMITATOR COUNTER: 1

I expect that counter to be past the nine thousand mark by the end of this.

Again, I go into little detail about what happens in the episode. I don't mention the part with SpongeBob trying to find others to help him, and then gathering the citizens. I don't mention what they do to rip off Pressure (with the live action ending.) Also, "well, forget it?" Did I have more to say, but stopped simply because I didn't want to write more of the review? I'm sorry, but what? I pretty much left the review incomplete here.

I summarize my thoughts in the final sentence and proclaim that the episode is stupid. I'd buy this, except that I don't describe what was stupid about it anywhere in the review. I have a feeling this is going to become a common issue.

Also, the least favorite X part. What made me dislike SpongeBob in this episode again? I suppose when he captures the fish, but otherwise I don't remember him being particularly heinous here. That quote also isn't an actual quote.

Does this review hold up? Somewhat. My opinions on the episode haven't changed much, but the review itself is very sloppy, feels incomplete, and doesn't describe anything.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

As I've mentioned, I don't think I'd change my mind that much. This episode really does leave much to be desired, in my opinion. I wouldn't say it's the worst episode (even back then, I found 58 episodes worse than it,) but I still think I will always remember this as an episode with a great idea that was executed in a stale manner.

Would I put this episode on the list if it were made today? Potentially, but I think I'd bump it down. If I made a bottom 100 or so, I'd think this episode would end up in the 60's or 70's. Yes, it's stale, and the ending is visually terrible, but I don't think I'd place it at 59. It's mostly inoffensive, and nothing in the episode really frustrated me that much. Even the live action scenes simply left me with distaste rather than pure rage. In other words, I'd place it as an honorable mention rather than an actual entry.

Tomorrow, I'll be talking about my review of Little Yellow Book. I remember that I had some... strong feelings for that episode, so we'll see if my review of it succeeded in fully conveying my thoughts or flopped hard like all of my reviews have so far.
 

Depressed Luigi

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How the heck is Rodeo Daze a bottom 60 episode?????? That episode is great!

Although, this is the same community that hates Atlantis and Truth or Square so I guess it really isn't that surprising or quite as bad lol.
 
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Wintermelon43 said:
How the heck is Rodeo Daze a bottom 60 episode?????? That episode is great!

Although, this is the same community that hates Atlantis and Truth or Square so I guess it really isn't that surprising or quite as bad lol.
I don't think it's bottom 60 material anymore.

Here's my review of 58:

"#58


Season: 9
Episode: 182a
Airdate: March 2, 2013

FUN FACT: This episode was originally going to air on November 25, 2012.

In this episode, Squidward is about to relax, but then stupid customers come in. They want their krabby patties now. Squidward wonders what is happening in the kitchen, and sees Spongebob writing in his diary. Squidward really wants to take a peak. He tricks Spongebob into going somewhere, while he reads it. The Bikini Bottomites begin laughing at the diary, but then when they find out it was Spongebob's, the town goes against them.

This is the problem with the episode. No one blames the Bikini Bottomites, only Squidward. I'm not saying Squidward is completely off the hook, I'm just saying that if you blame Squidward, you should blame the BBites aswell. Then, they steal Squidward's hou- WHAT THE HECK?!?

Don't even get me started on the ending. Everyone goes against Squiddy until SB stands up for him. They throw tomatoes at him after grabbing the diary in SB's pocket. I wish I worded that sentence differently.

As for you, SB_DW_Fan, I will dream about Post-film classics, just not in episodes that keep my attention throughout.

Least favorite character: Squidward
Least favorite moment: the ending
Least favorite quote: "I don't care, this is so worth it!" -Squidward (I hope you choke on your clarinet!)

HINT FOR NUMBER FIFTY-SEVEN: A curse of "deadliness""

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

Hey, this review is actually pretty detailed! It could be better, but the detail is better than it was in the previous entries.

And when it comes to anger, I'm not that atrocious with it. Aside from my "I hope you choke on your clarinet" fit at the end (which may have just been a joke, not too sure,) this review hardly takes a turn for the angry side.

So this review is short, but it's detailed. Better yet, the anger isn't too terrible. I guess calling the costumers stupid was somewhat unnecessary, but again, I'm finding minor flaws here.

Another nitpick I have is "I wish I worded that sentence differently." Why not do so in the initial review? If you're acknowledging that the last sentence is clunky when you initially reviewed it, then change it instead of pointing out that it's clunky. Besides, what's clunky about the sentence? Nothing really is. I state what happens in the episode as it is.

Does this review hold up? For the first time, I have to say that it does. There isn't too much anger throughout it, the details are pretty good, and the flaws it does have are very minor. Plus, I agree with the review.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

Whereas the previous three episodes I reviewed became better in my mind, this episode... stays where it currently is. I honestly think that #58 is a good position for it. It's a bad episode in my opinion, but it's not awful. There were a few gags that made me laugh ("I had a brother once," Mr. Krabs' Afro, and the old man in the toilet, for example.) The main issue is Squidward not learning his lesson at the end, as well as the Bikini Bottomites being extremely hypocritical (I know it's a joke, but I don't think it's funny at all.) Plus, the story doesn't really take the plot to interesting or new places.

Would this episode be put on the list if it were made today? Yep, and in this exact placement, too.

So yeah, for the first time, I found a good review. It's not great or anything, and it could be better, but I'm still mildly proud of it. I didn't think it'd happen at all, or even this soon.

Tune in tomorrow, where I look at my review of #57.
 

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Wintermelon43 said:
How the heck is Rodeo Daze a bottom 60 episode?????? That episode is great!

Although, this is the same community that hates Atlantis and Truth or Square so I guess it really isn't that surprising or quite as bad lol.
I thought Rodeo Daze was lifeless and boring as sin honestly.

Little Yellow Book is weak. Might make my bottom 60 but not anywhere high.
 
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Apologies for the lack of updates yesterday. I was taking care of family matters.

Here's my review of #57:

"#57


Season: 7
Episode: 141a
Airdate: June 11, 2011

In the middle of season 7, they released this thing called the Legends of Bikini Bottom. It comprised of 6 episodes:
The Monster Who Came to Bikini Bottom
Welcome to the Bikini Bottom Triangle
The Curse of the Hex
The Main Drain
Trench-Billies
Sponge-Cano!

Anyway, in this one, Spongebob is ready for closing time, when Madame Hagfish (we never heard on her, have we) comes in the Krusty Krab and asks for a Krabby Patty. It's closing time, so Sb sneaks her one, when Mr. Krabs gets angry, so Madame Hagfish puts a curse on the KK. A bunch of stuff happens, so Mr. K and SB go to Madame Hagfish, where she tells them to go to the Golden Eel. They get the thing (I don't remember because I haven't seen the episode in a while.), and Madame Hagfish reveals her curse was "CLOSED" sign.



No writers, you can't pull something like that.

Least favorite character: Madame Hagfish
Least favorite moment: The ending
Least favorite quote: "Well I'll be the slimy, son of a slithery, sea slug boy." -Mr. Krabs

Hint for 56: A tabloid full of lies."

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

Huh...

Well, what do you know? This review is also not that bad. Granted, my description of the middle could've been more descriptive (listing the curses, etc.), and there are some embarrassing grammatical mistakes, but the review is mostly solid from a critical standpoint. Unfortunately, my review doesn't sound too negative for this episode being in the bottom 60. The only part I seemed to dislike was the ending, which to this very day still confuses the ever living heck out of me. Even then, this review is still pretty good.

Does this review hold up? I would say so, to a small extent. There's a reason why I hesitate in saying this, and it's because...

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

This episode isn't bad enough to be here. I'd say it's not even bad. It's pretty decent, in my opinion. The closed sign twist is incredibly stupid, and the episode doesn't sport much of what I like about this show, but it's far from horrible. Heck, I'd say it's one of the better episodes of the Legends series. Only Welcome to the Bikini Bottom Triangle is better in that miniseries.

Would I put this episode on the list if it were made today? Nope. I think it's a decent episode, so it wouldn't be here. Again, there's not much I like about this episode, but then again, there's not much I hate about it, either.

Join me next time, when I review #56.
 
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Here's 56: (The title card is broken again. It's Patty Caper.)

"#56


Season: 6
Episode: 108a
Airdate: August 5, 2008

Yes, this little monster.
In this episode, Spongebob is working, when he hears about the Krabby Patty secret ingrediant being stolen. He wonders where it is, when Mr. Krabs tells him to blame people. He blames Plankton, Gary, Sandy, Squidward...

(dreams about classic episodes)
Skill Crane
Krusty Towers
Clams
(end dream)
It turns out it's Mr. Krabs.



Yes, I said it.

Least favorite character: Mr. Krabs
Least favorite moment: SB blaming people
Least favorite quote: All the fake stories SB tells

Hint for 55: concerts"

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

REVIEW IMITATOR COUNTER: 2

That joke about MoBrosStudios falling asleep in his own reviews of episodes was funny, but that's because it was his own joke. I'm pretty much stealing it from him. Not to mention that this episode isn't that boring, so I don't know what's up with that.

The review is also... odd. Mr. Krabs told SpongeBob to investigate the case of the missing formula, not blame people. I guess I didn't remember the episode too well, since it wasn't anything special from what I remembered, but seriously? I can't even give the correct plot points? What in the world?

Also, the details I give are very small, if there at all. Maybe it would help if I described the stories and accusations. That would've been better than giving this linear review that has little detail in it. I noticed this theme since #60, but it's still bothersome, especially here when this is an episode whose details are interesting.

That image is also supposed to say "pointless." While I think the episode was rendered pointless thanks to the stupid twist ending, I don't make that very apparent in the review. Again, that's what happens when you go into very little detail to give a review that's incredibly half-rear ended.

And again, that quote is NOT a quote! I suppose it is, but again, I'm not specific or descriptive!

Does this review hold up? NO! No it doesn't! It's not descriptive or well written, and it feels super rushed. Next part, please.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

This episode still isn't very good, in my opinion. However, I don't think it's that bad, either. It's mediocre, in my opinion. I hate the twist, and the episode has its other problems, like the fact that there's little comedy in it (and what the episode does have doesn't make up for that lack of comedy, either.) That said, it's not bad. Unfortunately, it's one of those types of mediocre episodes that I feel nothing for. Nothing about this episode is really all that good (aside from some creativity in SpongeBob's stories,) but nothing about it is really all that bad, either (aside from the stupid twist ending that renders the episode somewhat pointless, since Mr. Krabs pretty much set SpongeBob up to fail from the start.)

Would I put this episode on the list if it were made today? No, but that doesn't mean I like it. It's an episode that's like a bike without wheels. It's there, but it won't do much.

I'll post #55 tomorrow.
 
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Here's #55:

"#55


Season: 8
Episode: 165b
Airdate: September 30, 2011 (August 22, 2012 for Canada)

In this episode, Squidward listens to Kelpy Gee, then hears about a concert, so he tries to win tickets. He fails, but Spongebob wins. Spongebob then takes Squidward. Squidward is at first happy, then gets annoyed by SB. Same with the other squids there. Patrick comes and eats the freaking backstage passes (Screw you, Patrick!) and then Squidward and Spongebob get thrown out because some stupid idiot thought it would be funny to steal their seats (Screw you, giant squid). Squidward and Spongebob sneak in and play music, and SB gets the glory while Squidward gets taken away. (Screw you, security guards)

Horrible, horrible, horrible.
Least favorite character: Spongebob
Least favorite moment: The moments that made me say "screw you"
Least favorite quote: What the giant Squid said (I don't remember because I haven't seen the episode in a while.)

Hint for 54: The pet talent show."

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

Not very descriptive, is it?

Sigh... I knew this would be a common theme in the reviews. I don't believe I described the episode as thoroughly as I should have. I never mention the lack of backstage passes as a conflict. I never mention what SpongeBob does exactly to annoy people. I understand that I sound like a broken record here because many of these reviews share the same problems, but this is ridiculous. I want a better description from past me than this.

There's some... anger here, if you can't tell. It's not much, but you can tell that the episodes are really starting to tick me off. Normally, being super angry in a review isn't necessary, but I don't go into ALL CAPS RAGE in this review, so that alone makes this review decent in the anger department.

Also, "what the giant squid said" is my least favorite quote? Was I so lazy that I couldn't search up the transcript of the episode online? It exists for a reason. And SpongeBob as my least favorite character? Yeah, no. Patrick was way worse, and you all know it.

Does this review hold up? No. The anger in it isn't too bad, but the lack of sufficient description here ultimately kills the review for me. However, there's a bigger reason why it doesn't hold up, and that's because of what I'm going to describe next.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

From 60-56, you can tell that I hate the episode less (or, in Little Yellow Book's case, the same.) This episode, however, is one that I went too easy on. #55? This should've been in the bottom 3. That's how much I dislike this episode. Now, I can finally tear it apart.

SpongeBob is pretty annoying here. Concerts are usually the place for being loud, but in an environment like this that appreciates jazz music and calmness, why would you ever shout this much? SpongeBob is oblivious, but he's not supposed to be this ignorant and inconsiderate.

Then, we have Patrick. He eats the backstage passes for no reason. There's no motivation for his actions whatsoever. He also decides to go on stage to order nachos. How on earth do you confuse a stage for a place to order food?!? I could forgive this if it were funny, but it's not. At all. The crowd also lets him crowd surf. Why in this calm environment?!? It doesn't make any sense! In addition, how did Patrick enter the stupid concert in the first place? No explanation is given, and the writers don't even write in a joke about it to acknowledge this.

And why does that stupid squid get SpongeBob and Squidward's seats? There's a reason multiple tickets are printed with different numbers on them. The purpose of that is too prevent an event like this. Was there an oversight in the ticket numbers? Again, the writers don't throw in a joke that could've made the scene funnier. It's just frustrating.

SpongeBob plays his ukulele obnoxiously, and Patrick performs obnoxious acts, and they're praised by these people who would usually prefer a smooth and calm environment? And the one who appreciates that environment, Squidward, is taken away because of stupid plot reasons? No. That is not a good way to end the episode. And Kelpy G. downright shoves away Squidward, a passionate fan of his. Is this how he treats all his fans? If you are a person who treats your fans like that, you don't deserve any fans or fame.

Gosh, I hate this episode so much.

Would I put this episode on the list if it were made today? Definitely, but not at 55. I'd place it at #3. That's how much I downright despise this episode.

I'll post 54 tomo- Actually, scratch that. I made a double entry on the list, meaning that tomorrow, I'm reviewing #54 AND #53. And guess what? They're both episodes I barely remember. Yaaaaaaaay.
 

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Here's #55:

"#55


Season: 8
Episode: 165b
Airdate: September 30, 2011 (August 22, 2012 for Canada)

In this episode, Squidward listens to Kelpy Gee, then hears about a concert, so he tries to win tickets. He fails, but Spongebob wins. Spongebob then takes Squidward. Squidward is at first happy, then gets annoyed by SB. Same with the other squids there. Patrick comes and eats the freaking backstage passes (Screw you, Patrick!) and then Squidward and Spongebob get thrown out because some stupid idiot thought it would be funny to steal their seats (Screw you, giant squid). Squidward and Spongebob sneak in and play music, and SB gets the glory while Squidward gets taken away. (Screw you, security guards)

Horrible, horrible, horrible.
Least favorite character: Spongebob
Least favorite moment: The moments that made me say "screw you"
Least favorite quote: What the giant Squid said (I don't remember because I haven't seen the episode in a while.)

Hint for 54: The pet talent show."

REVIEW ANALYSIS:
Not very descriptive, is it?
Sigh... I knew this would be a common theme in the reviews. I don't believe I described the episode as thoroughly as I should have. I never mention the lack of backstage passes as a conflict. I never mention what SpongeBob does exactly to annoy people. I understand that I sound like a broken record here because many of these reviews share the same problems, but this is ridiculous. I want a better description from past me than this.

There's some... anger here, if you can't tell. It's not much, but you can tell that the episodes are really starting to tick me off. Normally, being super angry in a review isn't necessary, but I don't go into ALL CAPS RAGE in this review, so that alone makes this review decent in the anger department.

Also, "what the giant squid said" is my least favorite quote? Was I so lazy that I couldn't search up the transcript of the episode online? It exists for a reason. And SpongeBob as my least favorite character? Yeah, no. Patrick was way worse, and you all know it.

Does this review hold up? No. The anger in it isn't too bad, but the lack of sufficient description here ultimately kills the review for me. However, there's a bigger reason why it doesn't hold up, and that's because of what I'm going to describe next.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:
From 60-56, you can tell that I hate the episode less (or, in Little Yellow Book's case, the same.) This episode, however, is one that I went too easy on. #55? This should've been in the bottom 3. That's how much I dislike this episode. Now, I can finally tear it apart.

SpongeBob is pretty annoying here. Concerts are usually the place for being loud, but in an environment like this that appreciates jazz music and calmness, why would you ever shout this much? SpongeBob is oblivious, but he's not supposed to be this ignorant and inconsiderate.

Then, we have Patrick. He eats the backstage passes for no reason. There's no motivation for his actions whatsoever. He also decides to go on stage to order nachos. How on earth do you confuse a stage for a place to order food?!? I could forgive this if it were funny, but it's not. At all. The crowd also lets him crowd surf. Why in this calm environment?!? It doesn't make any sense! In addition, how did Patrick enter the stupid concert in the first place? No explanation is given, and the writers don't even write in a joke about it to acknowledge this.

And why does that stupid squid get SpongeBob and Squidward's seats? There's a reason multiple tickets are printed with different numbers on them. The purpose of that is too prevent an event like this. Was there an oversight in the ticket numbers? Again, the writers don't throw in a joke that could've made the scene funnier. It's just frustrating.

SpongeBob plays his ukulele obnoxiously, and Patrick performs obnoxious acts, and they're praised by these people who would usually prefer a smooth and calm environment? And the one who appreciates that environment, Squidward, is taken away because of stupid plot reasons? No. That is not a good way to end the episode. And Kelpy G. downright shoves away Squidward, a passionate fan of his. Is this how he treats all his fans? If you are a person who treats your fans like that, you don't deserve any fans or fame.

Gosh, I hate this episode so much.

Would I put this episode on the list if it were made today? Definitely, but not at 55. I'd place it at #3. That's how much I downright despise this episode.

I'll post 54 tomo- Actually, scratch that. I made a double entry on the list, meaning that tomorrow, I'm reviewing #54 AND #53. And guess what? They're both episodes I barely remember. Yaaaaaaaay.
Oh good, I was thinking #55 was way too high for that episode.
 
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I promised a double whammy, so a double whammy you all shall receive.

"#54


Season: 6
Episode: 168a
Airdate: April 2, 2012

Originally, Grooming Gary was going to be 54, but then I decided to put GG higher. For now, let's talk about Restraining Spongebob.

In this episode, Spongebob causes Squidward to get injured horribly, when he then snaps and decides to give Spongebob a restraining order. Things work out well until Patrick bothers him, and more STP happens.

Sorry for not talking about the episode more, but I haven't seen this episode in a while.

Least Favorite Character- Patrick
Least favorite moment- the ending
Least favorite quote- "My soda machine!" -Mr. Krabs (I want to kill you, you stupid crab.)"

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

Did I really use the phrase Squidward Torture P*rn? I did, and I want to slap past me in the head for doing so. If you or any others want to use the phrase, fine, but that's not what I prefer to call it. I call those types of episodes Squidward Misfortune Episodes, if you're wondering.

Besides that, the review has one other BIG flaw: There's no actual review here. I pretty much summarize the plot of the episode in a very non descriptive way, and offer no criticism as to why the episode is on the list. If you're wondering, it's because Squidward's misfortune is portrayed terribly here, and I'll describe this opinion in detail in the "my current thoughts" section. For now, let's just say that this review has little review and much plot summary. It's good to summarize the plot. In fact, it's essential. However, when you have all plot summery with no review within it, it's not a review. It's just something that could be written on a TV Guide.

Does this review hold up? Not at all. This review wouldn't be too bad if it were an actual review, but, again, it's just a plot summary. And my excuse for that (the excuse being that I haven't seen the episode in a while) is not good. Maybe if that's the case, I should read a plot summary on a wiki or something. That way, I'll have some basis.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

If there's something that I agree with, however, it's that this episode is pretty terrible. Squidward is put through much mistreatment throughout the episode in a lazy fashion. The slapstick isn't that funny in my opinion. I also find this episode to be really boring, going with how lazily the episode was written. Also, Patrick is annoyingly stupid here. As in, Smoothe Jazz at Bikini Bottom levels of obnoxiously stupid.

And what's with the ending? Patrick laughs, and the episode just ends. Okay...?

Would I put this episode on the list if it were made today? You know what? I would, and in this exact placement, too. #54 is the best spot for it in my opinion.

"#53


Squid's Day Off was awesome. Why did they rip it off with this?

In this episode, Mr. Krabs splits a nail (ouch), and puts Spongebob in charge(COMEON!), who follows Squidward's bogus lies, and destroys the KK.

To bored

Least fav character- SB
Least fav moment- the ending
Least fav quote- "One KK, covered with mud and slime." -SB

Hint for 52: The infamous eye injury."

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

Well, I agree with one part. Squid's Day Off is a way better version of this episode.

You know what sucks, though? This review seems to have been hastily written as well. The only real criticism I can see toward the episode in this review is the fact that I say I'm too bored (by the way, I misspelled "too" in the original review, as you can see.) Sure, this episode WAS pretty boring, but I've seen people who have the same opinion as me give this episode a really good and thorough review. What excuse did I have to write this review this lazily?

Does this review hold up? Nope, as you can see. There's not much here that feels like an actual review. Even the synopsis feels less descriptive than it should be.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

I do think that this episode is excessively boring. I find it so boring, in fact, that I think it's bad. But bad enough to be on the list? Not quite. If I made this into a bottom 100, this episode would be somewhere in the 80's. It's super boring and painfully slow, but it otherwise is fine. There's nothing super frustrating here. At the same time, I still don't like it.

Would this episode be on the list if it were made today? No, but that doesn't mean I like it. It's still a really bland experience from start to finish.

Join me next time when I review #52, which looks like another review that's not even a review. Sigh...
 
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Has it really been 6 days?

Better do this now, then.

"#52


In this episode, Spongebob gets a black eye from a toothpaste cap incident, and he lies about it to people.

That's the whole plot in a freaking nutshell. Wow.

Least favorite character- SB
Least favorite moment- SB lying
Least favorite quote- SB's lies

Hint for 51: Vacation in jail."

First of all, I need to apologize since I put such a large title card here. This might cause some serious lag.

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

THIS IS A REVIEW?!?

I'm sorry, but... there's nothing here. The review is so short, and doesn't describe anything. I summarized the plot in one sentence, and then mentioned that that was the plot, and the review's over! I have no idea how people back in the day could have tolerated such terrible reviews like this. I guess people were more willing to hear criticism of the show back then? I don't know what changed, but what I do know is that this review was awful back then, and it looks worse now.

Also, past me, could you PLEASE choose a quote instead of stating something that happened throughout the entire episode? Please? And what about SB's lying bothered me? Since I explain pretty much nothing, I'm baffled. I don't even think his lying is that bad, since it's a driving force for the interesting plot.

Does this review hold up? Nope. It's too simple to the point of describing nothing, and I don't even see an actual review here.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:

And you know something? I actually think this episode's pretty enjoyable. It's not great or fantastic in my opinion, but I do enjoy it. I could see what makes some dislike this episode (not that I've seen many who do,) but I personally enjoy it. SpongeBob's stories are really creative, and there's even some funny jokes. I still laugh at Patrick's line about suing people to this day. Even back then, I thought that line was funny.

Would I put this episode on the list today? Not at all. It's a very enjoyable episode with some creative stories and funny jokes. Not to mention that the twist of Jack M. Crazyfish being real makes sense, since SpongeBob had a dream that he was a bad guy earlier in the episode, and some people you see in your dreams are people you may catch a glimpse of on the street.

Because of the large break, I'm going to look at my review of #51 as well.

"#51


Season: 5
Episode: 84c
Airdate: July 23, 2007

During season 5, the show seemed to be spawning very brief and uninspired episodes. Not my least favorite uninspired episode (that title goes to Money Talks), but I still hate it. In this episode, Squidward and Spongebob compete to get to a vacation, and Squidward has one more left. He tries to get his name, and he steals his wallet, and bla bla bla. The episode ends with Squiddy in jail.

Not inspired whatsoever.

Hint for 50: Music isn't always good."

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

It's interesting that my criticism toward this episode is that it's uninspired, even though you could say the same with my review, and it'd also be an opinion I agree with.

Also, REVIEW IMITATOR COUNTER goes to 4. I refer to the season 5 shorts as brief and uninspired, the EXACT words that MoBrosStudios used to refer to them. I also mention that Money Talks is my least favorite uninspired episode, when that episode never even ended up on this list. I guess you could view it as an attempt to misdirect people, but I think I'm downright lying to the people reading the list by promising that an episode will be on the list when it isn't. Heck, Money Talks is an episode I don't even have much of a problem with nowadays.

And the way I refer to the season 5 shorts makes me think I hated them all. I likely didn't mean it that way, but I worded myself really poorly here. I do like some of the season 5 shorts (SpongeBob Vs. the Patty Gadget is particularly great,) even though I don't care or dislike most of them.

So, onto the rest of the review. I mention absolutely nothing of the "name the costumers" competition. If you'd never seen this episode, the "Squidward has one more left sentence" would've likely confused you. I don't blame you, either. My review lacked the actual details that it needed. I also shrug off most of the review by the end, summarizing the second half of the short in only one sentence. I really should've explained everything better.

And my final point: WHERE'S THE LAST PART?!? I didn't add a "least favorite X" section in this review. I don't know what that's about, other than the fact that I was lazy with this review. I guess you could say the review is "uninspired." Wait, I already made that joke...

Does this review hold up? Not particularly well, no. Again, detail could go a long way in reviews. I wish past me knew that before posting crap like this.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:

And guess what? I still don't like this episode. Allow me to make an actual review.

The big issue with this episode is that there's not much substance in the episode. The main plot isn't there much of the time. SpongeBob is saying high to certain costumers, while Squidward names them all off easily. There's not much tension that Squidward might lose the competition, especially after he only has What Zit Tooya left to name. SpongeBob doesn't seem to care about the competition, either, which also removes the tension.

Beyond that, the twists in this episode (What Zit Tooya being the costumer's actual name, and the brochure being the actual prize) are both really predictable, and having them both in the same episode feels somewhat cheap. The What Zit Tooya twist makes no sense anyway, since he says his name really aggressively even before Squidward was bothering him. Do you know anyone who says their name that angrily? I don't, because nobody should. Also, Squidward's punishment felt too severe, as he was targeted by the police officer because he ran a red stoplight. Not in a car, mind you, but on foot, which is NOT against the law if no cars are coming. I guess that's supposed to be a joke, but it sure isn't funny.

And why did they need to put Patrick in Squidward's cell, too? That was also too severe in my opinion. Plus, what did Patrick do to end up in jail? It's never explained, and the joke isn't funny. At least him being in jail at the end of SpongeBob Meets the Strangler makes sense, as he turned himself in for thinking he was the strangler. Plus, you don't feel bad for the stranger since he's a legitimate bad guy and law breaker, unlike Squidward in this episode.

Would this episode be on the list today? Not exactly. As much as I dislike this episode, it barely evades being placed on the list. If I made a bottom 100, I'd place this episode somewhere in the low 60's. It's still bad, however, so don't think I'm being nice to this episode at all.

That's it for today. I'll try to update this more often, but it's just hard with me now having a job. Tune in next time, when I review #50.
 
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I'm now going to analyse my review for #50.

(The title card is broken again. It's Slide Whistle Stooges.)

"#50


Season: 6
Episode: 105b
Airdate: February 16, 2009

While not as bad as its pairing episode, Slide Whistle Stooges is a pain. It opens with Squidward getting his newspaper, when he hears slide whistles. He gets annoyed by them, when he keeps hearing them. SHUT UP, SLIDE WHISTLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hate that sound. He then tries to get away, then he gets caught up in their act. Oh no, not another "Let's try to make Squidward as unlikeable as possible" moment. Squidward "dies" by falling off a cliff in a gasoline truck, and everyone chee- WHAT?!? Cheers?



YOU SUCK!

Least favorite character: The town.
Least favorite moment: People cheering that Squidward is "dead".
Least favorite quote: (After Squidward "dies") "YAY!!!!" -townspeople (I will kill them all.)

Hint for 49: Stage act."

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

Wow. For the first time in these reviews, I found a joke that was legitimately funny. The explosion, followed by "YOU SUCK!" in all caps actually elicited a laugh from me. Sure, it's a moment that could be perceived as being an overreaction, but it's still pretty funny.

Nothing else about the review is really that good, though. I find it odd that I put some good detail into Squidward getting his newspaper, and yet I put barely any description in the entire second half of the episode.

For example, let's just say that you, the reader, have never seen this episode. It doesn't matter if you have or not, but, just for the sake of this moment, put into your mind the idea that this episode is one that you have never watched. Now, read my review, and tell me if you'd be able to understand that plot synopsis completely.

I mention Squidward driving off the cliff in the truck, but never say anything about how he found the truck and began driving it. I don't mention what makes Squidward join SpongeBob and Patrick in their shenanigans. I don't mention what causes the townsfolk to want Squidward's blood so much. Nothing in this review really describes much. And speaking of failing to mention something, how come I don't mention the part with the hospital at the end? Granted, it's stupid, but it's still a sufficient part of the episode that I never say anything about.

And I also mention that I hate the slide whistle sound. That's poor wording on my part, as I meant that differently. The sound of the slide whistle isn't bad, but I hate that it's played throughout the entire episode repeatedly. That is what I meant.

And take a look at the least favorite X part. I still stand by much of that, but darn. That ending apparently had a negative effect on my thoughts on this episode (though it's not the only reason I hate it.)

Does this review hold up? Eh... I'm not too sure. I'm not descriptive or specific enough in my plot synopsis, and I word myself poorly, but this review isn't awful. It's actually mediocre, I'd say. Again, I liked the "YOU SUCK!" joke (which is made even funnier when you realize that an explosion occurs both here and in the episode, something I just now realized.) Overall, though, I could've done a better job.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

Refer back to the previous paragraph, and note that I was hesitant in saying that the review doesn't hold up. The biggest reason why I did this is because I agree with pretty much everything I said here. Again, I didn't put much description in the review, but the review part is pretty much spot on. I still hate this episode.

If I'm being perfectly honest, I think this episode could've been great as a season 5 short. I think the slide whistle joke could've worked really well if they were in an episode that was only 4 minutes. However, having the exact same joke for 11 minutes makes the episode pretty darn annoying, and the ending is horrific for reasons I think I put enough emphasis on.

Would this episode make the list today? Without a doubt. I'd probably place it slightly lower, as it's not the worst episode, but it's pretty darn bad. The ending is atrocious, and the slide whistles joke gets old after the 4 minute mark.

That's it for #50. Tune in to #49 sometime in the future.
 
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Here's #49:

"#49


I don't remember this episode to well, but I remember the basic meat of it.

In this episode, Squidward suggests to make a play. Mr. Krabs and Spongebob end up ruining the play. The audience becomes extremely unlikeable, bla bla bla.

Annoying. To quote SB_DW_Fan:

"It not only has Squidward abuse, but also Spongebob abuse."

Least favorite character- the audience
Least favorite moment- people throwing stuff at Squid and Sponge
Least favorite quote- People complaining about their food. (SHUT UP AND GO GET IT SOMEWHERE ELSE, YOU-)

Also, Dinner Theater is perfect. Singy Eaty Time is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

Hint for 48: I hate Sundays (not Mondays, Garfield!)"

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

No, past me. You did not remember the basic meat of this episode. Or, maybe you did, but this review does not indicate that in any way.

First of all, I yet again decide not to state much with the plot, and I even seem to lose interest in the review. I add a "blah blah blah" as if I'm already bored, call the episode annoying, steal a quote from another member on this website, and that's about it. Though, with stealing that quote, I do cite my sources instead of resorting to plagiarism. My English 2 teacher would've been proud.

I really do wish I could say more about this review, but I can't, as it gives me very little to work with. It's so short and describes barely anything. Yeesh, I sound like a broken record in these reviews. Can you blame me, though? When pretty much every review has the same problem, what do you expect?

Also, the REVIEWER IMITATOR COUNTER has increased to 5. My frustration toward the impatience of the customers in this episode was clearly stolen from illiniguy34's review of this episode, who made that joke way better than I did.

Does this review hold up? No, thank you, it does not. I'd reiterate on the issues with it, but I'd be repeating myself.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

This episode is still pretty bad, if I'm being honest.

This episode is really frustrating with its treatment toward SpongeBob and Squidward, who don't do anything to deserve their mistreatment. Patrick is really obnoxious here, existing to do nothing but throw heavy objects at people. Because the audience loves it when Patrick exists simply to hurt people and be a complete jerk, right? If you couldn't tell, I was being sarcastic.

And this episode is also painfully boring and unmemorable. It's so unmemorable, in fact, that for the longest time I had thought that this was the only season 7 episode I hadn't seen. When I watched a rerun of it in late 2013, I was surprised to find that I had seen it.

Beyond that, this episode is also a big rehash of Culture Shock. Both that episode and this one feature Squidward putting on a stage production at the Krusty Krab, and the costumers not liking it. However, Culture Shock was actually a really good episode, in my opinion. It was funny, had memorable scenes, and Squidward's mistreatment was justified since he was being a jerk to SpongeBob.

Would this episode be on the list today? Yes. I'd most likely put it somewhere in the 50's, so my opinion on it has become more positive, but only slightly. Being in the 50's on the worst episodes of SpongeBob list is still a failure, though, and I do hate this episode. Go watch Culture Shock, instead. That's a much better version of this incredibly boring slog.

My next post will be analyzing my reviews of #48, #47, and #46. I did a triple whammy there. It's too bad none of those reviews looked good. I actually caught a glimpse of something in my review of #46 that make me want to analyze the review as soon as possible, so I might actually post the next update tomorrow. Maybe.
 
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Well, I actually posted the update two days later, but close enough.

"#48


If I hadn't just recently rewatched the episode, this episode would have been 47 spots higher. I'm not kidding, I've always thought until recently that this was the worst episode ever.

I started watching, and the plot. Oh my gosh, the plot. It's so unoriginal. Spongebob and Patrick annoy Squidward. Good, it seems okay. Problem? Where's the humor? Opposite Day executed this plot well. Why couldn't this episode?

Nothing really more to say.

Least favorite character- the guy at the end
Least favorite moment- Squiddy getting CS
Least favorite quote- "You will get community service every Sunday of the rest of your life." -guy. (I WILL KILL YOU IN YOUR SLEEP!)"

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

Again, what is with the brief reviews that describe very little? If you have never seen Good Neighbors, then guess what? This review puts you out of luck. I don't really state much about the episode other than the fact that it's an annoy Squidward episode. The critique isn't super awful when it's there, as I compare the episode unfavorably to Opposite Day (which is one of my favorite season 1 episodes, if I'm being honest). That's a step in the right direction for my reviews. I hope the next review I read doesn't ruin that development.

And "nothing more to say"? Wrong! There's plenty more to say. How about I mention the giant robot? The lodge? Anything? This is like a reverse version of some of my other reviews. In many other reviews, I don't add much description to the plot, and there's no review in it, either. In this review, however, there's little review, and almost no description about the plot. Yikes.

Squidward getting community service was a moment I disliked, sure, but nobody would know what I was talking about since I never mention that part of the episode in the review. I also feel the need to mention my unneeded rage toward the community service man, who I supposedly feel the strongest urge to exterminate in his state of slumber. That's slightly extreme, isn't it?

Does the review hold up? Well, this is hard to say. The critique is overly brief, but it's still decent. I actually compare it to a better episode, for one. Overall, I'm going to say no, but it's definitely one of the better reviews I'd written back then.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

Yeah, I still think this episode's terrible. Squidward's misfortune here doesn't work as well as it did in previous "mistreat Squidward" episodes because of the fact that he really doesn't do much to deserve it. I'll admit that the episode doesn't do the best job at saying who I should be rooting for. I root for Squidward here, but he does act like a maniacal villain, particularly when he cackles like a maniac upon discovering his order for the security system. At the same time, though, he just wants to relax on his day off, and SpongeBob and Patrick act like annoying idiots.

I feel that this episode is also missing something that made the earlier "annoy Squidward" episodes work. I think it has to do with this episode lacking any sort of humor, in my mind. I don't even see attempts at jokes here. There's probably something, but I'm not seeing it. Even Skill Crane and the Lost Mattress, "mistreat Squidward" episodes that came after season 3, had some humor mixed in, especially in the latter's case.

Would this episode make the list today? I think I'd honestly put it higher than #48. Even still, it wouldn't make it in the bottom 30 or anything. I'd put it at #35 or something, I guess. It's not the worst example of a bad "Squidward mistreatment" episode, but it's still terrible nonetheless.

The title card for #47 is broken. It's Sentimental Sponge.

"#47



This episode suffers the same problem Good Neighbors suffers. The episode just doesn't make anything work. The only thing I found funny was the "Squidward wears a dress" gag. Who thought having Spongebob being a hoarder was a good idea? Grease isn't a memory, you idiot!

I know I barely talked about the plot, but who gives.
Least favorite character- SB
Least favorite moment- Squidward getting his house condemed (IT'S not HIS fault!)
Least favorite quote- "Right after we condem your house!" -Cop (see ^)"

REVIEW ANALYSIS:

There's no plot listed anywhere. There's nothing detailing what occurs in the episode or anything. Yet, I remember a specific joke and specific moment. How the heck does that work?

And "who gives"? I know who gives a care: the people reading these reviews. They want someone to write a good review, not a review like this. This is terrible. One of the worst reviews here, actually, as it's even more lacking in a description than most others. That's not a good review.

Does this review hold up? Nope. Moving on.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

Yeah, this episode wouldn't be on the list anymore.

I'm admitting it right now. I no longer think this episode's bad. Instead, I find it more mediocre than anything else. The "Squidward wears a dress" gag was pretty funny, but otherwise, nothing in this episode really stands out that much. Even Squidward's house being condemned leaves me feeling empty. That's what this episode is: empty. Heck, the episode "Sanctuary!" from season 9 features the same type of plot, and I think that episode works better than this one does, even if it's not that amazing, in my mind.

Would this make the list? Obviously, it wouldn't. It wouldn't even make a bottom 100 from me.

Now we're getting to the review I'm really interested in mentioning.

#46 is Karate Island. The title card is broken AGAIN.

"#46


If you're quick to assume, no, I don't hate the episode because it was #1 on the BDE countdown. I hate it because it's boring, the idiotic character moments, and stuff like that.

Why am I so non-discriptive? I was fine on my top 117, but not here? I must really not like this list.

Least favorite character= SB
Least favorite moment= the ending
Least favorite quote= "Sandy's gonna miss this, big time!" -Spongebob (eh, dont know what to say here)

Hint for 45: Hyped up!"

I point out how non-descriptive my reviews are.

I point that fact out.

Hey, past me! If you realized this, how come you did nothing to fix that problem?

I hate this review.

Does it hold up? It sure as heck doesn't. It doesn't detail the plot. Also, what about the character moments seemed idiotic? I don't explain anything.

MY CURRENT THOUGHTS:

I do find this episode pretty boring, in all honestly. I also think that SpongeBob is somewhat smug here, thinking that he's somehow better at karate than Sandy, despite Karate Choppers showing that they're pretty evenly matched. He was also smug in As Seen On TV, but that episode was actually funny, in my opinion. This isn't.

Also, for an episode called Karate Island, Sandy doesn't use it to defend SpongeBob until floor #4. She used jelly donuts, a hair dryer, and her helmet for the other 3.

Would it make the list? No. In all honestly, this is one of my least hated episodes that I still dislike. It came close to being mediocre, and it would've been if it weren't for the big flaws it had.

That's it for #48, #47, and #46. Come back soon when I look at my reviews of #45 and #44. I'm honestly pretty excited to talk about those reviews, and you'll see what I mean when it comes to my review of #45.
 

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I do hate Slide Whistle Stooges and Smoothe Jazz at BB a lot.

The rest are pretty weak, but they don't stick out a ton. But I do love Blackend Sponge, I find that episode really hilarious. Karate Island is one I really liked too. SpongeBob is a bit smug but I can look past it a bit as the island got to his head and he learns his lesson in the end.
 
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Hopefully SSJ doesn't mind me coming back to this all nearly two years later.

The title card is broken AGAIN. It's SpongeBob Vs. the Big One.

#45



Can you say disappointing? That is one word that describes this episode.

Season: 6
Episode: 111
Premiere: April 17, 2009

I used to love this episode, but after watching it again... Yeah. Apparently, the weather is to hot, so they go to the beach. They crash into each other and get flung in different directions. SB, Pat, and Squid have to learn how to surf the Big One, according to the people there. Spongebob says he doesn't know how to surf, so the guys help him- WAIT A MINUTE. Not knowing how to surf? Last I checked, Spongebob, you were good at surfing in Ripped Pants, and you and Pat were darn good at it in Pranks a Lot.

The next problem with this episode- Sandy and Mr. Krabs. They serve no purpose to the story, other than to fill time up. All Mr. K does is argue with the Flying Dutchmen, and Sandy just builds stuff. Here, here's a clip with Mr. Krabs:

Mr. Krabs: Oh please, Mr. Dutchmen! I didn't mean to spill your groceries!
Flying Dutchmen: Well, normally, I wouldn't mind, but I'm a little low on cash this month, so I have no way to pay for more. Unless you have some money I can-

(cut to Nostalgia Critic- Casper)
(song) Cause this is filler,
filling up the time,
an hour and a half is just to long
for an uncreative mind.
Filler night! (song)
(back to episode)

Yeah... It all works out in the end, with them getting back.

Oh, I just remembered another problem with this episode. Remember this bit:

JKL: One of you will not return.

False, they all came back. Wow.

Least favorite character- the Flying Dutchmen
Least favorite moment- JKL playing his bongos
Least favorite quote- "Just keep breathing." -JKL (I think surfing means more than that, "surfing expert".)


REVIEW ANALYSIS:

Well, darn. We were so close to a good review. I actually went pretty descriptive in the first half. Not super descriptive, but it works, and I bring up some good points. Then, I rip off the Nostalgia Critic and go undescriptive, and the whole review falls apart.

REVIEW IMITATOR COUNTER: 6

Also, I'm pretty sure JKL wasn't saying one person would be stuck on the island. He said one person wouldn't make it back home. He's that person. And those least favorite X categories were some really random moments that don't even stand out to me anymore. I'm not sure what made me angry.

Does this review hold up? In terms of being a decent review, the first half's at least good.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:

This episode is an episode, really. It doesn't stand out as being too good or too bad in my opinion. One part I did like was the Davy Jones cameo, which I thought was really funny. Otherwise, there's nothing about this episode that stands out to me one way or the other.

Would this episode be on the list today? Obviously not. This episode doesn't stand out to me at all.

It's another broken title card. It's Pineapple Fever.

#44



Season: 6
Episode: 125A
Premiere: June 2, 2009

Sorry, EVIL. Not everyone loves this episode. This episode is really stupid. Because of a storm, Spongebob and Patrick can't go jellyfishing.

Say, that reminds me of A Friendly Game. The differences being this episode isn't funny. At all. Squidward gets abused a lot.

Here's every example of Squiddy abuse I can think off:

Eating Snail Food.
Forcing him upstairs.
Falling a long distance because of a tornado.
Being annoyed.
Getting his eyebrow ripped out (toenail scene 2.0) and hits his head on the bowl.

Least favorite character- SB
Least favorite moment- The puzzle moment
Least favorite quote- "That's cheating." -Spongebob

CHEATING?



YOU WOULDN'T KNOW CHEATING IF IT SLAPPED YOU IN THE FACE!


REVIEW ANALYSIS:

What's with my old reviews and not being descriptive? Apparently, the only thing notable about this episode is Squidward being put through mistreatment. Most of those examples aren't even that bad. This episode irritated the heck out of me, but I chose the least offensive parts of it to critique (aside from the eyebrow scene. That deserves its criticism.)

There's way worse moments than what I chose. I could've highlighted the annoying gag with SpongeBob listing stuff off that goes on way longer than it should've. I could've mentioned the puzzle bit that's considered cheating and Patrick being so stupid he can't figure out where it goes (I mention it in the least favorite X portion, but I could've highlighted it a little better). Or, better yet, how about the weird ending of the characters suddenly stealing food from each other? That felt really tacked on.

Does this review hold up? Not a bit. Again, this episode is ripe with awful moments, and I chose some of the most inoffensive parts of it to talk about. Also, my opinion on A Friendly Game is definitely different: I no longer like that episode.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:

Yeah, this episode is still bad. It's basically an unfunny version of Club SpongeBob. The gags aren't funny and are mostly infuriating, the jokes that aren't frustrating go on way longer than they should, and the episode just lacks so much substance. Not to mention, the "food wars" ending felt like it belonged to a different episode than this one.

Would this episode be on the list today? Oh yes it would. Again, it's really frustrating. I wish I say more, but I said everything I needed to in the review analysis.

The title card is broken AGAIN, everybody. It's Grooming Gary.

#43



Season: 6
Episode: 110b
Premiere: November 28, 2008

I know a lot of you like this episode, but I don't. Why? I'll get to that.

In this episode, Spongebob tries to help Gary get ready for the pet show. He sees other pets are well groomed, so he abuses Gary about it. Gary gets angry and so do the other pets.

Why don't I like this? Two words: GARY! ABUSE! I know it's being used for a moral, but still. At least "The Great Snail Race" had entertaining value.

Least favorite character- Spongebob
Least favorite moment- Spongebob, well, grooming Gary
Least favorite quote- "Maybe you need shades, huh, Gar?" -Spongebob (hence the hint of annoying obliviousness)


REVIEW ANALYSIS:
I've got a better excuse to call this episode bad: It's boring. Like, really boring. It's essentially The Great Snail Race without anything that made that episode memorable (and I'm not even a fan of that one). Also, while I understand the use of "abuse" in this context, it makes it sound like I'm putting a cartoon snail's mistreatment that doesn't even exist on the same level as actual animal abuse. Sorry, but as much as "abuse" in cartoons annoy me if they're not done correctly, comparing them to real-world abuse is just silly.

I will at least say the "least favorite moment" made me laugh for reasons that should be obvious. The least favorite quote, on the other hand, is not good. You can tell I just chose a random quote from the transcript and threw it in because none of the quotes struck me as that bad (or I didn't remember the episode well enough.) Either way, it's not good.

Does this review hold up? No. It feels like every angry review of bad post-movie SpongeBob from 2013 - 2014, the time when SpongeBob SquarePants' Seasonal Rot era was being trashed more heavily than anything else in terms of the entertainment industry by many Caustic Critics. I can't believe I fell into that stereotype myself.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:

So, the supposed Gary abuse doesn't really anger me. But you know what makes me dislike this episode? It's staler than old bread. Nothing about this episode struck me as interesting, and it's one of the few episodes that made me nearly fall asleep. It takes a really boring episode to do that, and the only episode of this show I've ever truly fallen asleep to is New Fish in Town (which sadly isn't on this list, so I don't have an excuse to trash how horribly bland that one was). Yeah, I've got nothing on this episode other than that it bores the heck out of me.

Would this be on the list today? Eh, there's worse episodes to make me say it's not qualified for being bottom 60. Bottom 100, maybe, but not bottom 60.

#42
Gone


Season: 6
Episode: 104b
Premiere: March 5, 2008

Gone. Gone. Gone. What the heck?
I'm just gonna quote GordoktheMad for this:

"If this episode ended with Spongebob beating up his friends for leaving him alone, this episode wouldn't be on the list."

Least favorite character- everyone except Spongebob
Least favorite moment- the town stomping on the Spongebob statue's ashes
Least favorite quote- "It was National No Spongebob day." -Mr. Krabs (all of you are jerks)


REVIEW ANALYSIS:
What exactly is this review? Okay, the first line can just get removed. I say the name of the episode three times and then ask a random question. Okay. Then I quote a user that sadly doesn't visit this site anymore. You know what that user has that I didn't? Actual intelligence in reviewing episodes of this show. Seriously, how stupid was I back then?

But yeah, this review is awful. I don't even say anything about the plot. Gordok's quote would mean nothing to anybody that hasn't watched this episode before. Plus, while I don't like this episode, here's a big issue: I don't actually agree with Gordok's opinions on it to an extent. In other words, the only reason this review and this episode's placement exist is to give Gordok a pat on the back for actually being a good review unlike me prior to 2015 by saying I agree with his opinion when I didn't fully do so. I know I sucked as a member here back in 2013 and 2014, but seriously? This review is awful. One of the worst so far.

Does this review hold up? You take a wild guess on what I think.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:

Sorry, Gordok, but I find the ending to be one of the least offensive parts of the episode. As much as I don't like it, the whole car love subplots was indubitably much worse in my opinion. It was weird and was a really out-of-place Twilight Zone reference. Overall, this episode's not exciting. A good portion of this episode is also just SpongeBob mimicking all his friends. Kind of funny that a later episode would do that concept so much better, isn't it?

Would this episode make the list nowadays? As much as I don't like it, I don't hate it enough for that. It's off the list.

#41
Demolition Doofus


Season: 8
Episode: 173b
Premiere: July 21, 2012

Spongebob injures Mrs. Puff so badly that she can't inflate anymore. When she finds out about a demolition derby, she plans on getting Spongebob KILLED. YES, I SAID KILLED.

Least favorite character- Mrs. Puff
Least favorite moment- Mrs. Puff trying to run Spongebob over
Least favorite quote- "WHY ARE YOU STILL ALIVE?!?" -Mrs. Puff (Was that nessicary?)


REVIEW ANALYSIS:
Good Lord, my lack of competency is killing me in these old reviews. As much as I hate Mrs. Puff wanting SpongeBob to get killed, I am so vague about everything in this review. Both the sentences I use to state the plot of the episode seem so unconnected that anybody who hasn't watched this episode before would be absolutely puzzled. Also, as much as I criticize Mrs. Puff in this episode, SpongeBob isn't much better.

Last thing: That's not at all how you spell "necessary." How I failed that one that badly I have no idea. I know my spelling was atrocious back then, but this is a new level of awfulness.

Does this review hold up? It's so vague that it doesn't at all.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:
Yeah, my thoughts are still the same. This episode is really bad. Mrs. Puff is terrible because she goes overly extreme toward SpongeBob in attempting to kill him, and SpongeBob is terrible because he acts like an annoying twerp in this episode by talking down to Mrs. Puff in really obnoxious ways. Also, the one time Mrs. Puff commits an actual crime is the one time she's not put in jail? Really?

Would this episode make the list? Forget making the list, I'd put it higher than #41. Probably the bottom 20 would be a better spot.

#40 is The Thing. There sure are a lot of broken title cards this time around. (But I had to cut most of them out because I can only use 5 images, lol.)

#40
The Thing


In my opinion, The Thing is when Spongebob went downhill. Squidward gets injured HORRIDLY (OH MY GOD HORRIFYING), and he gets abused.

NEED I SAY MORE?

Least favorite character- Gary (Probably the only time I wanted Gary to be shot dead)
Least favorite moment- Squidward in the cage
Least favorite quote- "Wild animals don't belong here, son. They belong in the zoo." -Guy (NO, THEY BELONG IN THE WILD TO ROAM FREE, YOU IDIOT!


REVIEW ANALYSIS:
It's bad. This review is bad. The all-caps rage is not necessary (see, I CAN spell it now). Plus, Squidward's injury isn't horrifying so much as it is really uncomfortable when you think about it. Also, "gets abused?" How vague can you be in a review after this point? And yes, you DO need say more, as you barely review this episode.

And what exactly did Gary do to deserve my anger? I don't remember him being that heinous. His attacks against Squidward make sense because he doesn't recognize the creature. And even if this did bother me, it apparently angered me enough to say that I want a cartoon snail shot dead. First off, that's messed up. Secondly, didn't I just a few entries ago complain about his supposed abuse in Grooming Gary? Yeah, I was a hypocrite in my old reviews.

Does this review hold up? Of course not. Next.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:
Yeah, this episode still sucks. It's basically Jellyfishing if everything good about that episode was done completely wrong instead. Squidward's mistreatment in this episode isn't funny, nor is it warranted. Also, it's much funnier in Jellyfishing when he was angry the whole time compared to in this episode where he's in genuine distress.

This episode definitely deserves to be on this list. It's really bad.

#39
Tentacle Vision




"Boooriiiiinnng!"

You described it so well, Potty.

Yes, I find this episode boring. Boring. Boring.

Holy cow, boring. Boring is what makes it higher than Good Ol Whatshisname and the Thing. The two episodes I mentioned earlier are more sadistic, this one is more boring.

It doesn't help that it's a Squidward Abuse episode.

I know I'll get flack for making a last minute edit, but I don't care.

Least favorite character- Zeus
Least favorite moment- Squidward getting kicked out of his house (who ever did deserves to be strangled)
Least favorite quote- "And you!" -Guy (Kill him!)


REVIEW ANALYSIS:
Hey, past me, could you use smaller title cards next time please? Thanks.

Okay, so I call this episode boring without going into detail as to why this episode is boring. And I use the word boring 7 freaking times in this review. Could I at least have tried to vary up my vocabulary back then?
By the way, this episode is another one where Squidward's mistreated. Here's the issue: I don't describe why that's the case. I wish I was actually descriptive here, but I wasn't for some reason. Oh, and:
"I know I'll get flack for making a last minute edit, but I don't care?"
WHAT DID I MEAN BY THIS?!? Seriously, this is such a confusing sentence that seems to have no context whatsoever.

Clearly, this review doesn't hold up. Next.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:
It sucks. Squidward did nothing to deserve his television show being taken over, and he gets kicked out of his house for no reason. Then, he's somehow back in at the end. Also, Zeus the Guitar Lord is really annoying. This used to be my least favorite episode before I realized that there's much worse out there. Unfortunately, this list was made before my actual least favorite episode aired, so yeah.

This episode deserves its spot on the list. Maybe slightly lower would work, but overall, it's still a bad episode.

#38
Best Day Ever



I wonder if I should move this topic into "piss off GordokTheMad."

This episode is lazy. Lazy. Lazy, every meaning of the word. Overhyped. Overrated. Stupid. Not funny. Boring. Weak. Horrible. My goodness, and we're not even halfway through the list.
I just want to give the positives out:

The song.
The "SIT DOWN!" joke.

Everything else feels as curt as Waiting. (which will be high on this list)

Least favorite character- Spongy
Least favorite moment- Patrick being a selfish jerk about the net
Least favorite quote- "This was supposed to be my perfect day..." -Spongebob (what makes it so special?)


REVIEW ANALYSIS:
Stop with the big title cards, please.

Let's go line-by-line: The first part is a joke. It's mildly funny. Then I... call the episodes words, I guess. Hey, past me, word of advice: Criticism toward something means absolutely nothing if you don't bother to explain your thoughts. What about this episode is lazy? What about it is weak? What about it is stupid? And overrated? Last I checked, not too many people like this episode.

Believe it or not, I used a word wrong. (Past me using a word wrong? WHAT A TWIST!) "Curt" means rudely brief. Apparently, I thought it meant boring. See what happens when I try to use big and fancy words that I don't know? I sound quite silly, don't I?

Oh, and Patrick wasn't selfish about the net at all, buddy. If there's one thing this episode gets right, it's that the characters aren't unlikable at all. Even SpongeBob, despite being entitled, still has quite a few good moments.

Needless to say, this review doesn't hold up at all.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:
Like SB vs. the Big One, this is an episode that doesn't stand out to me at all. It exists is the best thing I can say about it, really. I guess this means it's off the list, too.

#37
Spongehenge


Horrible. My goodness... so dull... so dull...

In this episode, Spongebob just gets chased by jellyfish...

This video sums my thoughts up:



NOTE: This guy is going to review every episode, so don't critisize him for being a 'post-film hater', as he is going to give the newer episodes a chance. If anyone talks nasty about this video for the reason above, I will defend the video.

Least fav character- Spongebob (two in a freaking row)
Least fav moment- The ending... oh God, the ending...
Least fav quote- "Laughing" -Spongebob


REVIEW ANALYSIS:
This isn't even a review. At all. I just say a few things, then let PIEGUYRULZ finish me off. It's almost like ripping off better reviewers was something I did back then really often. In fact... REVIEW IMITATOR COUNTER: 7. Was I seriously so lazy that I just let someone else do the review for me? Inexcusable.

Not only that, but while Pieguy's review of the episode I linked isn't bad, it is a Pieguy video before 2013 (it was uploaded in late 2012). Pieguy himself even says in his SpongeBob Season 5 Review that this video has a few oddities in it, and yeah, 2013 was the year Pieguy's content started getting really good. And look at the note under the link. I'm really eager to defend Pieguy-Senpai from his "evil" critics, apparently. I know I sometimes joke about being a fanboy of him, but I didn't know I actually was one during my older days. And the least favorite X part at this point has no meaning because I'm really just putting random stuff in them by this point.

This review clearly doesn't hold up because I didn't even make one.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:
Yeah, my opinion hasn't improved. This episode is really un-SpongeBob in many ways. It feels like they tried being experimental, but they forgot that it was SpongeBob and that the episode should actually be funny. Experimental episodes can actually work well, but they need to also be funny at the same time, and this one isn't. At all.

Yeah, it deserves its spot on the list.

#36
Keep Bikini Bottom Beautiful


If you didn't get the hint, I was referring to the Pre-school song "Clean up, clean up", which I never understood the point of. EVEN AS A 3 YEAR OLD!

So, in this irritating episode, Squidward is walking one day, and he steps on a piece of gum. Then, a cop comes and gives Squidward a ticket for littering, as well as community service.

Now, here's where we run into our first problem: In real life, gum isn't considered litter. Even if it was, a policeman would not give you community service with it (Please don't remind me of the season 4 atrocity).

Squilliam comes by and brags about his statue. OK, that's it! I want to say right away:

I hate him! I feel he's a showoff. That's why Squilliam Returns is low on my list. Band Geeks is high on the list because Squidward wins and Squilliam "the snob" loses. I hate you, Squilliam! Squilliam is also the 2nd most overrated character. (The most overrated, of course, is Plankton.)

So then, Squidward gets more tickets, and more tickets, and more tickets, and more tickets, and more tickets, and more tickets, and...

One Eternity Later (I had the card in the actual text, but I can only use 5 images in this post, so I had to cut it)


...more tickets. MORE TICKETS! OK, that's bad. Not only is there over-the-top Squidward abuse (he doesn't even deserve it), it focuses on ONE FREAKING JOKE! I dare anyone on the face of the entire universe to tell me at least ONE joke that doesn't focus on tickets. ONE JOKE. Tell me at least one other joke. Come on, I dare you.

Least favorite character- the cop (Kill him...)
Least favorite moment- Squidward getting a ticket because the other ticket fell on the ground (PICK THE FREAKING TICKET UP, YOU :DOLPHIN NOISE:ING COP!)
Least favorite quote- "Boy, you sure did." -Cop (You make no sense.)


REVIEW ANALYSIS:
Hey, look, a joke that doesn't fall flat on its face: the One Eternity Later joke was decent. This review has a lot wrong with it, though. Let's count it off, shall we?
1: Believe it or not, past me, that hint for this episode wasn't actually that clever. That's what happens when you let me write a review at the age I was when I wrote this: 12 years old (the age where people think they're so much more of a hot shot than they really are).
2: Yeah, I'm so cool saying that I hated children's songs at a young age. So cool, am I right?
3: While it's true that gum isn't considered littering, that's far from the biggest point against this episode, the fact that it's not realistic.
4: "Community service" reminds me of Good Neighbors. Okay then.
5: Squilliam is a treasure. How dare I touch him with criticism.
6: Squilliam Returns is also a treasure. It's one of my favorite episodes. I didn't even have issue with it back then. I guess I just wanted to sound unbiased by saying bad things about pre-movie episodes, but I've learned what makes those episodes work usually.
7: Plankton is not overrated and is also a treasure. How dare I touch him with criticism.
8: The joke, while not a complete failure, goes on too long.
9: It's not abuse, buddy, nor is it over-the-top. It's annoying, but that's all it is.
10: I threaten people if they tell me about other jokes in the episode. How cool I was back at 12, am I right?
11: Don't kill the cop.

This review sucked.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:
But you know what? This episode sucks, too. It's really repetitive with it using the same joke again and again with no variation on it, and the episode's just not interesting. It definitely deserves its spot on the list.

#35
The Krusty Sponge


What an irritating episode. Spongebob is forced to work on the train the whole time without a break, and the :dolphin noise:ing townspeople won't give him a break. COME ON! You know when I said that Pearl was my least favorite character? The townspeople are my NEW least favorite character(s). The ending irritates me. Mr. Krabs get NO FREAKING COMEUPPANCE! Instead, Squidward keeps getting whipped with the judge'- WAIT A MINUTE? HE'S WHIPPING SQUIDWARD INSTEAD OF MR. KRABS?!? AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

Least fav character- Krabby
Least fav moment- the end
Least fav quote- "It smelt like the rear end of a goat." -guy (I smell stuff in my nose that people mention, so I did NOT need to hear that)


REVIEW ANALYSIS:
What an angry review. I get mad for virtually no reason and even resort to all caps. Because that totally doesn't make me look immature, am I right? Yeah, exactly. Not a good review on the basis that I describe nothing.

CURRENT THOUGHTS:
Forget my criticism. Okay, there's some criticism against this episode, but overall, it's actually darn good. The satire on the way Nickelodeon markets the show is quite priceless, for one. But there's a pretty good story here, and the jokes land quite a bit. The ending's kind of lame (what did Squidward do wrong exactly?) but the episode's still good.

Maybe I'll do another post of these later, unless I forget about it. However, that's all I can take of my bad reviews for now. Soon, I'll update the rest of this thing.
 
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