America's 50 worst states according to Gawker

President Squidward

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46. California
Home to roughly 12% of the nation's people, California is by far our most populous state. With that comes many good things. And also lots of bad.

The Bad: The state starts to look slightly less than progressive when you consider Proposition 8, the Governator, the existence of San Diego and Orange County,
Um... Excuse me? :O
 

hfjs

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34. Georgia
The Peach State can be just peachy, but also a little too preachy.

And there's certainly something to be said for the sprawling drone of Atlanta, the way it's become in a lot of ways the black capital of America and the gay epicenter of the South
SAY WHAT?!?!
 

Spongeo

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The Bad: So many crazy, News of the Weird-type things happen in Florida that Fark has created an entire tag just for them. Think of Florida as a cookie or candy with a grandparent crust and a frothing, criminally insane filling. The middle of the state is a cultureless void from which crystal meth (or, like, moving away) is the only escape. Florida's brand of conservatism is one of the dumbest, and who can forget when the state was the trigger-man for that whole election theft back in 2000. Florida is a swampy morass of misery and boredom and church and guns and drug-addicted babies. Florida feels like a work of fiction. But it's depressingly real.
Offended....Miami can be crazy but I have nearly lived there its not that bad I love this state
 

E.V.I.L

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I lol'd at the Rochester cross-off in the NY description though it pisses me off they base our whole state on that one ::dolphin noise::ing overrated city

But when I saw ALASKA's description, and now IM REALLY PISSED.

It's huge and empty and scary and dark and cold.

Well smart one, it's not cold in the summer, EVEN BARROW goes above freezing in the summer. 80's is not uncommon in Fairbanks and you get HOURS of daylight in the summer. So you fail at that.

Ever been to Fairbanks? Yeesh, it's a pit in the summer. In the winter it's 30 below and full of chemical fog.

In the summer, it's fine. If you think 70 is cold and you don't live in a really hot area, I can't say anthing. I'll agree with the winter but maybe I LIKE THAT D:
Everything in Alaska is approximately a four hundred million hour drive from everything else, and you can't even drive to the capital city.
Don't overexaggerate the distances. The second one is fne.
People like the Palins and the Johnstons are the ones who made it out of Alaska. Those are the state's successful dynamos! But really, yeah, the weather. I once asked a waitress in Valdez how much snow they got last year and she said "40." And I said "Inches?" And she said "Feet." and I cried just thinking about it.

I hate people who hate things due to politics. Grow up. The snow is your opinion.




Phew.



I lol'd at the Rochester cross-off in the NY description though it pisses me off they base our whole state on that one ::dolphin noise::ing overrated city

But when I saw ALASKA's description, and now IM REALLY PISSED.

It's huge and empty and scary and dark and cold.

Well smart one, it's not cold in the summer, EVEN BARROW goes above freezing in the summer. 80's is not uncommon in Fairbanks and you get HOURS of daylight in the summer. So you fail at that.

Ever been to Fairbanks? Yeesh, it's a pit in the summer. In the winter it's 30 below and full of chemical fog.

In the summer, it's fine. If you think 70 is cold and you don't live in a really hot area, I can't say anthing. I'll agree with the winter but maybe I LIKE THAT D:
Everything in Alaska is approximately a four hundred million hour drive from everything else, and you can't even drive to the capital city.
Don't overexaggerate the distances. The second one is fne.
People like the Palins and the Johnstons are the ones who made it out of Alaska. Those are the state's successful dynamos! But really, yeah, the weather. I once asked a waitress in Valdez how much snow they got last year and she said "40." And I said "Inches?" And she said "Feet." and I cried just thinking about it.

I hate people who hate things due to politics. Grow up. The snow is your opinion.




Phew.
 

Dr. Peter Lankton

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15. Ohio

The home of seven presidents, Ohio is the belly-button of America. A kind of center, a reminder of who we are, but also kind of gross.

The Good: A decent amount of people live in Ohio, so that's a change of pace for today! Ohio has big cities like Cleveland and Columbus and Cincinnati (what's with the Cs, guys?) to serve as cultural capitals. Plus Ohio is chock-full of great schools — from state institutions like massive Ohio State (excuse me, the Ohio State) and preppy Miami of Ohio, to hippie-dip dumpster dive paradises like Kenyon and Oberlin. Ohio indulges our fascination with Amish people pretty thoroughly. Part of it is situated on a big fat lake, so if you're into that you can do that. Lots of rural Ohio is very pretty — pastoral and red-barned and all that.
The Bad: All the people who live in (or near, I guess) those quaint red barns are total jerks (politically speaking, at least). Everyone who lives in the cities is poor and miserable. Calling Cleveland and Cincinnati "cultural capitals" is sort of a sad joke. (Ha, Cincinnati thinks it's people.) Ohio still uses its ridiculous (if dwindling) political power to elect chuckleheads like John Boehner to positions of power. They once set a river on fire. People from Cleveland, one of the worst cities to live in, tend to get all butthurt when you, correctly, tell them it sucks. Ohio feels like it's full of serial killers. (You can drive by a house that Jeffery Dahmer lived in as a kid outside of Akron and it's sooo scary.) Oh, and string me up for this, but buckeye candies taste bad. Deal with it.
Final Score: 4.41
This guy pretty much knows what he's talking about. Cincinnati and Cleveland are terrible and pretty much every other big city in Ohio is poor. I can't begin to tell you how accurate the serial killer thing is. Disagree on the buckeye candies though, they're pretty good.
 

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Dr. Peter Lankton said:
This guy pretty much knows what he's talking about. Cincinnati and Cleveland are terrible and pretty much every other big city in Ohio is poor. I can't begin to tell you how accurate the serial killer thing is. Disagree on the buckeye candies though, they're pretty good.
haha, my sister lives in Cleveland, it's a real dump. Why is Cleveland Clinic in Cleveland out of all possible cities in the world it can be located in... :|
 

Spongeo

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haha, my sister lives in Cleveland, it's a real dump. Why is Cleveland Clinic in Cleveland out of all possible cities in the world it can be located in... :|

Actually there's an other one in Weston.
, FL which is in S. Florida that my grandparents used to go to.
 

NastyPatty2002

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And this comes to us a day after the nation's most patriotic day of the year.


This guy is hilarious. At least he didn't take shots at Richmond (when I read his view for Virginia).


I found a map with Google's autocomplete done for each state. For example, Massachusetts is a coffin....



Stay classy, America.
 

SpongeyKid

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Yayyy!!! I'm 50! Go New York! Although some of the description for the states could be offensive... :nono:
 

kev

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WOO #50!

Yeah, i'm also offended. DRUG BABIES? LETS START A RIOT! (I'm happy and angry)
 

SpOnGeFaN818

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Yep, I'm in the number 1 state. I've personally gotten used to stuff like the heat, and I mostly just stay away from the racism and stuff, but I can't say I'm surprised at all that it landed there.
 

Sunshine Banjo Face

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NastyPatty2002 said:
And this comes to us a day after the nation's most patriotic day of the year.


This guy is hilarious. At least he didn't take shots at Richmond (when I read his view for Virginia).


I found a map with Google's autocomplete done for each state. For example, Massachusetts is a coffin....



Stay classy, America.
I'm in PA and I know nobody racist. That map is wrong.
The Bad: Thanks a lot for Rick Santorum, assholes. Pennsylvania is a deceptively big state. You think it's all mid-Atlantic, East Coasty liberal shtick, but then you look out on the horizon and realize the rest of it's Pennsylvania too and once you get into Bucks County or Altoona or wherever the hell else, it's a whole different kind of place. So thanks again for Rick Santorum, Pennsylvania's answer to the question "What would evil look like if it wore a suit and had a daughter?" MAKES NO SENSE SO WHY IS PA 37?
 

NastyPatty2002

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Trophy said:
I'm in PA and I know nobody racist. That map is wrong.
It doesn't matter whether it's wrong because it's simply what appears in Google autocomplete. Do you really think half of the autocomplete things are even logical? Do you really raise an IQ by eating gifted children?



It's just what the morons of earth search in the search box, making it one of the autocomplete results, based on what gets typed most in there. Doesn't matter whether it's true, false, stupid, logical. It is just a poll of what some of us search.
 

Sunshine Banjo Face

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NastyPatty2002 said:
It doesn't matter whether it's wrong because it's simply what appears in Google autocomplete. Do you really think half of the autocomplete things are even logical? Do you really raise an IQ by eating gifted children?



It's just what the morons of earth search in the search box, making it one of the autocomplete results, based on what gets typed most in there. Doesn't matter whether it's true, false, stupid, logical. It is just a poll of what some of us search.
ok you got me there.
 

Spongeo

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Google is right about Florida we could be the craziest state but its bad in a way
 

The Squid

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Okay, I'm glad California ranked up so high, but jeez, they spent the bad part describing how SoCal is basically a pointless and seedy place. I understand tax rates are bad and the school system is about as useful as a potato, but saying that this:



And this:



Are pointless is like saying "Oh I believe millions of people shouldn't exist." Nice, guys.

Btw, people do have houses in California.
 
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