Oh boy, here we go. “Karate Star” is definitely not infamous or notorious, but it surely isn’t liked. And I mean…I think I know why. And by I think, I mean I’m 100% sure I know why. It’s because Patrick is a jerk in this episode, full-stop. And y’all should know by now I hate when this happens. This was an episode I hadn’t seen for many years before rewatching, so let’s see if this critique still holds water. (Spoiler alert: it does)
I’m going to be honest, I already don’t like the plot of this episode. Karate is a Sandy and SpongeBob activity
only. It only works when it involves their characters, and that’s just a fact. I’m also annoyed because they already have been inserting Patrick into plots that don’t involve him (see: many season 6 episodes), so why are they doing this? I’m also extremely unenthused that in an episode about karate, Sandy is nowhere to be found. So I’m already upset, and this does not bode well for the episode.
At least the beginning of this episode is cute. SpongeBob using his karate skills for the mundane task of chopping up some pineapple is cute, and reminds me of “Karate Choppers”. And also, it’s a SpongeBob-Gary moment, so of course I’m going to love it. Though of course the moment is ruined by the whole playing out of a bad joke, and then SpongeBob laughing for too long. So thanks for that, episode. And it takes about a minute for this episode to start showing us Patrick being a jerkwad. Well, firstly, it makes us sit through a rather boring and unfunny moment of Patrick not realziing that SpongeBob is choking at first, though this doesn’t last too long thank god. Patrick punches SpongeBob into a wall, since he doesn’t really know that SpongeBob’s choking, just that he’s “not right”. This ends up saving SpongeBob’s life…as we will be reminded of in a second. Because yeah, it takes about 30 seconds for Patrick to go from savior to annoying jerkwad. I’m sorry, but you saving your best friend’s life should not be something you expect to be owed for. Like this is a ridiculous plot point, and this first minute or two of the episode should’ve been rewritten (maybe then we could’ve actually included Sandy!). I understand that this was supposed to be a humorous moment, but it simply didn’t work for me.
Moving on, we get SpongeBob teaching Patrick how to do karate. At least we get to see a different move than a simple karate chop for once. Though I don’t see how this inverted whirlpool maneuver is a “basic move” (I’m assuming it’s because SpongeBob actually just wanted a reason not to teach Patrick, given his attitude right before this, but this is all conjecture…and probably wrong since the next move actually is easy). See, I’m nitpicking like this because this actual segment of the episode is a drag, and this is all I can do to entertain myself, since the episode isn’t doing it for me.
Speaking of not doing it for me, the pacing of this episode is all off. Firstly, I don’t know why they only went with 2 moves to decide Patrick is unteachable, instead of the far more predictable (and sometimes predictable is good, because predictable works) 3 moves. It kind of throws things off, and makes this teaching portion feel rushed. And it causes us to spend too much time with Patrick going chop-crazy. Because as it turns out, Patrick has a perfect chop. One thing I do like about this episode is that SpongeBob doesn’t get jealous of Patrick or anything like that, because I was definitely concerned once Patrick started chopping things like a knife to butter.
Instead, the episode has Patrick completely forget about the responsibility part of his agreement with SpongeBob. And here’s where my pacing issues pop up again. Instead of Patrick slowly getting more and more irresponsible and chaotic, he goes straight to trying to chop a stroller with a baby in it. You know, chopping a baby in half. What? On one hand, it works because it elicits shock in the audience, and it subverts expectations of an actual build up. On the other hand, can we just have some normal pacing please? Because why on Earth is Patrick trying to chop a baby. This joke gets a startled laugh out of me. I don’t hate it, it’s just very out of place for this show, I think. But if there were more jokes like this, I wouldn’t hate it.
The episode returns to regular pacing once Patrick starts chopping up everything, and this part of the episode is boring. And guess why? If you guessed because it’s just Patrick, and I’ve said many times that Patrick does not work in isolation, then you’d be correct! The bit at the Krusty Krab was probably the best of this, but it wasn’t great either. Eventually, things improve immensely once the lifeguard fish comes in and is perfectly dramatic, just the way I like it. I also loved the return of SpongeBob’s unicycle here. And then all of a sudden, Patrick’s hand has a mind of its own, which is certainly a direction for this episode to go in. I’m not sure I’d call it the best direction, but it is a direction. I think an episode about Patrick simply learning responsibility is fine, no need to add this. And frankly, this part of the episode bores me like so much of the rest.
It’s not until Patrick finds a Sponge-O, and thinks that it’s SpongeBob, that the episode begins to actually entertain me again, because this part was pretty funny. Especially once we get the double subversion that Patrick did actually get SpongeBob crushed. And I very much appreciate that unlike another episode (”Stuck in the Wringer” lashings, yay!), Patrick actually regrets his actions very clearly here. I know this should be the bare minimum, but listen I’d be saying this even if it was season 1. I like wholesome stuff. And this little ending bit, with Patrick regrowing his arm (and his chopping hand growing a body) reminds me of a couple things. Firstly, it reminds me of the end of “Spy Buddies”. Secondly, it reminds me of this sick (in a good way, to those possibly unfamiliar with the terminology LMAO)
SpongeBob horror comic from a while back. I think about this comic from time to time, it was such an interesting time, being there as it uploaded.
I can’t tell exactly what the biggest problem of “Karate-Star” is. Maybe it’s that it’s boring for so much of it. Maybe it’s that the pacing is off. Maybe it’s that Patrick is a jerk for certain parts of it. Well, I don’t think it’s the last one actually, but I think a combination of the first two is our answer here. This episode is just a weird watch. With the off-pacing and the boring moments, I can’t help but think about how much better this episode could’ve been with a restructured plot, and that’s disappointing. And with that extra little sprinkle of jerk Patrick here, I have to put this episode in “Mediocre”, even if Patrick does somewhat redeem himself by the end of the episode. Kind of.
Episode Tier: Mediocre
Episode Score: 5.7/10