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Bunny Hunt

Episode Info
Typed By: Honest Slug

(The episode begins inside Squidward's house, there he opens his oven which has a meal shaped like Squidward's head, then he proceeds to squeeze a bit of lemon juice on it, and brings his creation to the table)

Squidward: (In a French accent) I am a culinary genius, no? (He sets the meal on the table where a wooden mannequin is seated on a chair) Here you are, sir. Ze specialty of mah house. Roast Salad à la Squidward. (Gasps) Sacré bleu! I must apologize, monsieur, I have forgotten the parsley for the garnish! (Puts the meal back in the oven) Stay warm, my little squiddy. (Squidward kisses the meal, his lips proceed to burn, he screams) Le owwwww! (he closes the door to the oven and goes to his garden in his backyard with scissors in his hands) Typical, I always forget something. (He tries to cut the parsley, but it plummets right back to ground, Squidward tries to pull it out, but his face submerges beneath the ground, reveling that a sea bunny was trying to take the parsley) A sea bunny? (Squidward takes the parsley from the sea bunny, the sea bunny proceeds to rip off Squidward's fake mustache and uses it to build the strings ukulele, the sea bunny starts playing music from it and walks away, Squidward gets his head out of the ground and gets back his chef hat back on, he now speaks without the French accent) That voracious vermin is ruining my French chef fantasy, why… (the sea bunny pops out from the ground creating a hole, Squidward falls into the hole and the sea bunny eats the parsley, angrily, Squidward tries to catch the sea bunny only for the sea bunny to pull his chef hat over his head, then the Sea Bunny starts tickling Squidward) Oh, oh, no no, no, I have a ticklish core! (Starts laughing until the sea bunny jumps on his head and goes away, Squidward starts smelling the smoke from his house, then when a fire erupts inside Squidward rushes into his house with a hose) My roast à la Squidward! (He puts out the fire, carrying his burnt meal, he sits down and starts crying, the bunny pops out from the ground and starts crying with him, Squidward notices) What the… (He grabs his fork and until the sea bunny shoves Squidward's burnt roast à la Squidward in his mouth, this makes Squidward sick and he goes off-screen while the sea bunny bounces around)

(Bubble transition)

(In Squidward's garden the sea bunny dances around and eating Squidward's vegetables to the tune of classical music, the sea bunny then notices Squidward who is dressed as a Viking)

Squidward: I declare war on all bunnies! (He rushes towards his garden with a club, he tries to smack the bunny, smashing his vegetables in the process, until the bunny pulls out a shield, which when Squidward hits leads to his club getting stuck on his face briefly, he growls when he sees his destroyed garden) I am going to bury that bunny! (Squidward falls into a hole)
Bunny Wunny: He-he (The sea bunny burps, then he buries Squidward, waters him with a watering can, throws the can out, and walks away, the plant then comes out of the ground with Squidward's face hanging off it, Patrick then walks over)
Patrick: Wooow! That's the ugliest eggplant I've ever seen! I don't think Squidward would mind if I took a little taste. Come here. (He bites on Squidward's head, but fails to pull it off making bounce back to his rock)

(Bubble transition)

Squidward: (In Squidward's garden the sea bunny pulls out a basket and starts putting vegetables in it, suddenly a giant carrot comes out of the ground, the sea bunny starts smelling it until legs come out of the carrot and it starts walking away, the sea bunny follows it, inside the carrot it is shown to be Squidward inside) Ha! He's going to fall right into my trap! Ha, ha, ha! (Squidward trips over a rock and the bunny starts eating his carrot costume, Squidward then calls animal control) Hello, animal control. I've got a sea bunny cornered in my garden and need assistance! (The animal control truck comes over with Patrick inside, the officer comes out and puts the sea bunny in the cage) Did you have to catch him that easily!
SpongeBob: (Handcuffing his arm to the cage the sea bunny is in) I demand the release of this poor woodland creature. He's got rights too ya know.
Squidward: This is none of your business, SpongeBob. Go away!
Animal Control Fish: You want him? You can keep him. (Hands the sea bunny to SpongeBob) It saves me a trip to the incinerator.
SpongeBob: Hooray! (A rainbow appears forming a cloud under him that says "Happy!" and then via the cloud he drifts to his pineapple)
Squidward: I'm warning you, SpongeBob. Keep that filthy animal away from my… (The door gets slammed on his face)
SpongeBob: (Opening the refrigerator) VEGETABLES!!! That's what you like. Isn't it, bunny? We'll see what we got in the fridge. (the bunny sniffs and opens its mouth) Woops, I'm outta veggies, but I've got something even better! Gary's good, yay! (A close-ups shows a finger and an ear inside Gary's food) Does Bunny Wunny like his dinny winny? (Bunny Wunny throws the food at SpongeBob's face) Alright, Gary's food is out. Got it. I'll getcha veggies, I'll be right back! (SpongeBob shapes into a rocket and flies into the Barg n' Mart, Bunny Wunny's tummy growls and starts to bite off a table, a chair, and the circuits in SpongeBob's TV which makes him puff up) Bunny Wunny, I've got a surprise for y… (Dropping the vegetables, SpongeBob and his teeth scream at the destruction of his house, Bunny Wunny goes into the bag of vegetables) I'm going to have to chew-proof this whole house, fast! (Pulls out hat sauce bottle) Hot sauce outta' do the trick. (He pours it on his couch and other appliances, when Bunny Wunny licks it he burps fire, he goes to burn an employee of the month portrait of SpongeBob, a shelf with accolades, books, a piggy bank, a ukulele, a spatula, a portrait of SpongeBob with his parents, and a portrait of Gary, after SpongeBob pours some hot sauce on Gary he sees the fire everywhere inside his house) Huh? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! (He takes out a fire extinguisher, absorbs the liquid, and fires it off everywhere to stop the fire, Bunny Wunny then grabs the hat sauce bottle on top of Gary, drinks all of it, throws it out, then releases a gigantic fiery breath towards SpongeBob's Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy comics) My comic books! (Takes out a water gun and extinguishes the fire with it) I got to get rid of all that hot sauce! (SpongeBob licks off all the hot sauce in the room, due to how hot it is his face turns red and screams, he then plunges his face into the toilet and flushes it to stop the fire)

(Bubble transition)

SpongeBob: Here we are. (A cage is now present) Water supply, check. (Some supply of water is put inside) Trampoline for hopping, check. (A trampoline is put inside) Buckteeth sharpener, check. (A bucktooth sharpener is added) And an adding machine for multiplying (An adding machine is put in the cage as well, SpongeBob laughs) Triple checkeroonie. Now the bunny will be more than happy to stay in its cage, huh? (SpongeBob pushes the cage towards Bunny Wunny, Bunny Wunny sniffs it and kicks it away furiously) Doesn't like cage, check. (Bunny Wunny growls, rips out a hole in the wall, and starts crawling inside the walls) No, no, bunny! Don't go in there, you'll get lost! I need my jellyfishing net! Oh, where did I put that thing? (SpongeBob walks over to his couch and starts searching in the cushions) Probably dropped it in here somewhere. Got it! (Pulls out his jellyfishing net and Patrick)
Patrick: Hello.
SpongeBob: Patrick, did you fall between the cushions again?
Patrick: No, SpongeBob. I fell between the cushions, but I have a solution to your bunny problem! I love the hunt! (Patrick grabs SpongeBob's jellyfishing net, eats out a hole in the wall, and starts crawling inside the walls, knocking around a ton of stuff in SpongeBob's house in the process)
SpongeBob: (Panicked) No, no! No don't! Please don't! That's mine! Alright, Patrick, that's enough hunting. You can come out now.
Patrick: I can't… see. Where I'm going. How do I get out of here! (Screaming in terror) SpongeBob, where are I… (Gets completely engulfed inside the wall)
SpongeBob: (Worried) Stay where you are, Patrick. I got an idea. To the pet shop! (A video game-like map shows SpongeBob go to the pet store) Thank you. (He comes back to the pineapple) Patrick, I bought a second bunny to lure the first bunny out of hiding!
Patrick: (Off-screen) Hooray! (SpongeBob opens a cage where a female sea bunny comes out, Bunny Wunny comes towards the female sea bunny and the two start romantically dancing together, SpongeBob is shown to be playing music with the accordion, Patrick becomes visible inside the wall) Hold still, Patrick. I see ya. (SpongeBob rips a hole in the wall and Patrick is able to breathe)
Patrick: Thanks, buddy. (Bunny Wunny and the female sea bunny start hopping over each other) Aw, bunnies. (Both SpongeBob start laughing and follow the two bunnies into the bathroom, the two bunnies go inside the basket, a male sea bunny pops out)
SpongeBob. One. (A female sea bunny pops out) Two. (Another sea bunny pops out) Three? (A ton of sea bunnies pile out)
Patrick: More bunnies!
SpongeBob: Yay (After a bit he starts to look slightly concerned, all of the sea bunnies go inside the walls) Uh-oh. (SpongeBob and Patrick look serious and take out their jellyfishing nets) Patrick, the hunt is on! (They do their war cry, climb through the walls, follow the bunnies through the front door of the pineapple) Come back Bunny Wunnies!
Squidward: (The perspective switches to Squidward's garden where Squidward is mourning in funeral attire, he speaks in a french accent) This is ze last carrotte. (places last carrot next to a tomb stone which says "R.I.P. Squidward's Garden" C'est la vie. (A sea bunny pops from the ground, Squidward is furious) One more step, and I will spit you on a roast! I mean roast you on a spit! (Squidward feels the ground shaking) Oh, oh… what's happening! (SpongeBob and Patrick pop up)
SpongeBob: Don't worry, Squidward.
Patrick: Yeah, we're here to help.
Squidward: They're growing! (He shrieks and runs into his house, he bunnies follow inside even when he zips the door shut, he makes a call) Hello, animal control? SAVE ME! (Bunnies completely flood the house, knocking Squidward out, Squidward takes out a mallet from his shed) Get out of my house! (He smacks his house) That'll get them out! (The power of the mallet completely destroys Squidward's house with the bunnies piled up to look like a replica of it)
SpongeBob: Sorry about your house, Squidward.
Patrick: Yeah, we just heard.
Bunny Squidward: (Hits himself on the head as his brain flies out, he laughs manically, his eyes get swirly and he gets the tail, ears and teeth of a bunny) I'M A BUNNY NOW! (Manic laugh) I'M A BUNNY NOW! I'M A BUNNY NOW!
Animal Control Fish: Okay, Mr. Tentacles. Easy does it. (He puts a straight jacket on Squidward who is a bunny now, Bunny Squidward kicks him away and runs off while the Animal Control Fish chases him off to the sunset)
Bunny Squidward: (Hopping away while laughing crazily) I'M A BUNNY NOW! I'M A BUNNY NOW! (The perspective goes back to the mass of bunnies that resembles Squidward's house where Bunny Wunny looks like Squidward, grumbles, and walks inside while playing the clarinet)
End