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Perfect Chemistry

(at Sandy's treedome)
Sandy: (puts down the blowtorch and lifts her helmet) Almost done. Could you hand me that wrench, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: Nu unh unh. Lab partner.
Sandy: Huh?
SpongeBob: You called me "SpongeBob." I thought we agreed to address each other by our proper titles.
Sandy: SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Unh unh unh unh! Lab Partner. (Sandy takes the wrench, which saddens SpongeBob)
Sandy: There. It's finished. Now I can hide my nuts back in Texas without leaving my lab. (picks up a pile of nuts and shoves them in her machine. It bursts into a bright light and now the nuts are gone) It worked! Hooray! (hugs SpongeBob)
SpongeBob: We did it! (Sandy's machine rumbles and the nuts appear next to it)
Sandy: Aw, nuts. (cut to the Chum Bucket where Plankton is using a blowtorch on something. Stops using it and lifts up his helmet)
Plankton: Finally, the day has come.
Karen: You mean Thursday?
Plankton: No. It is the day I steal the Krabby Patty secret formula from Krabs.
Karen: And why, pray tell, is today different from the other days you've failed to steal it?
Plankton: (Plankton growls) Because today, I've completed my greatest invention. Behold! (takes the cloth off his invention)
Karen: What exactly am I beholding? A vegetable steamer?
Plankton: This is no ordinary vegetable steamer, Karen, my computer W.I.F.E. It's my latest invention. And isn't she a beauty? Meow. (hugs the steamer)
Karen: Oh, brother. (she rolled her eyes)
Plankton: Sweetie, you're going to help me achieve my devine purpose, aren't you? Yes, and steal the Krabby Patty recipe! (laughs evilly. The machine dings) It's ready. (goes inside the vegetable steamer with a pink towel wrapped around his waist) Oh, boy. (sitting inside of it like a sauna) Whew! Man, is it hot in here.
Live Action Broccoli: (wearing a pink towel like Plankton) Tell me about it.
Plankton: (pulls a switch and comes out of the steamer in a gaseous form) It worked. In this new gaseous form, I will be able to silently squeeze through the cracks of the Krusty Krab. (laughs. Floats over to the Krusty Krab)
Mr. Krabs: Money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money, money… (Plankton squeezes through the bottom of Mr. Krab's office door and giggles)
Mr. Krabs: Now, how much was—(Plankton goes into Mr. Krab's eyes) Hmm. (sniffs the air) Ew.
Plankton: Finally, the moment has come. (Mr. Krabs puts a fan on his desk and it blows Plankton away) No. No, no, no, no! (screams and he gets blown into Sandy's face)
Sandy: (holds her nose) Ew. (picks up her blowtorch and swings it in the air)
Plankton: Hey, cut it out!
SpongeBob: Plankton, is that you?
Plankton: Of course it's me, you moron.
Sandy: You were able to convert yourself into gaseous form? Facinatin'!
Plankton: Huh? Wait! (Sandy puts gaseous Plankton into a jar and into the freezer. Waits a few seconds then takes him out as a solid piece of ice)
Sandy: I guess I never realized you were such a student of science. Maybe you could help me fix my nut transporter.
Plankton: Huh? Did you say "transporter?" Hmm. Interesting. (climbs in the transporter and looks around) Hey! Maybe if I combine this device with my own invention, the Krabby Patty formula will be mine! I mean, I think I have the right parts in my lab, maybe.
Sandy: We're in business. (cut to Sandy and Plankton are walking into the Chum Bucket lab) Say, this is a dandy lab.
Plankton: Is that good?
Sandy: (laughs) Does a pig play poker?
Plankton: I guess.
Sandy: (looking through the table of test tubes) I should have visited you before. What with you and me being the only two scientists in town.
Plankton: (laughs) Yes. (SpongeBob walks in carrying the transporter on his back. He struggles with it)
Sandy: Yes, sir. The lab is amazing.
Plankton: Do you really like it?
Sandy: And how! (SpongeBob falls on his face with the transporter on his back)
SpongeBob: Here's your teleporter, lab partner.
Sandy: (picks it up) Thanks, SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: I said, please call me "lab partner."
Sandy: So where do I hook up my teleporter?
Plankton: Oh, just plug it into that doohickey over there (points to the steamer)
Karen: Just who are you calling a doohickey?
Sandy: Wowee! Is that a real Mark III Surplus W.I.F.E.-omatic? She is beautiful.
Karen: (chuckles) Oh, why, thank you.
Plankton: No, not that doohickey. This doohickey! Just plug your teleporter into my device, and with our combined might, we shall conquer the world! (panting)
Sandy: Uh-huh. Or I could combine your gas-ifier with my invention and transform my nuts into a gaseous cloud that transports them back to Texas!
Plankton: (sighs) Yes, that's what I meant. (Sandy plugs her invention into Plankton's invention and the transporter glows brighter than before)
Sandy; Yes! It's working at last, new lab partner.
SpongeBob: Oh. I guess you won't be needing me anymore. (SpongeBob's heart breaks into pieces. He walks away)
Plankton: That's right, and don't let the door hit you on the way out.
Sandy: Hold on! You can't go, SpongeBob. We need you.
Plankton: What? He'll just get in the way!
SpongeBon: Need me? (sniffles) How can I help? I'm not even a… (sniffles) scientist.
Sandy: Why, you'll have the most important job of all. You'll be our test monkey.
SpongeBob: Test monkey? (cut to SpongeBob zipping up a monkey suit and imitating monkey calls) Test monkey reporting for duty!
Plankton: A test monkey? (cries) I-I've never had a test monkey before! (hops onto Sandy) There is some mad scientist in you after all! (laughs evilly. Sandy laughs with im) Okay, we really have to work on your evil laugh. (cut to Sandy plugging in a connector into one of SpongeBob's holes)
Sandy: Ready!
Plankton: Roger! (jumps on the level in front of him and has trouble pulling it down) Urgh! Just a sec. (jumps on it a few times before it finally is pulled down. The transporter glows bright and then SpongeBob's eyes disappear)
SpongeBob: Hey, who turned out the lights?
Sandy: Ugh, we only teleported his eyes.
Plankton: Oh, boy, try again. (cut to Squidward, whom is flipping patties at the Krusty Krab)
Squidward: Where is that idiot SpongeBob? Leaving me stuck with all the cooking. This job stinks! (sniffs the air) Ooh, literally. (looks behind him where there is SpongeBob's eyes floating in the air, looking at Squidward. He screams and runs into Mr. Krabs' office) Mr. Krabs! There's something in the kitchen you gotta see! (cut back to the lab)
Sandy: Oh, well. (SpongeBob walks into a wall)
Plankton: Try again. (Sandy pulls the lever but this time SpongeBob's eyes reappear on his face. Cut back to Squidward)
Squidward: See for yourself! Huh?
Mr. Krabs: (sniffs the air and chokes) I see. So it was you that befouled me office earlier, was it? (cut back to Sandy and Plankton putting in more connectors around SpongeBob)
Sandy: Just a few more adjustments.
Plankton: Okay... Let her rip!
SpongeBob: Do you think this is a good look for me, or is it a bit too flashy?
Sandy: Stand clear! (pulls down two levers)
SpongeBob: Clear of what? (disappears. Cut to Squidward, who is mopping the bathroom) Something weird is going on around here. (SpongeBob's mouth appears but in gaseous form)
SpongeBob: Hi, Squidward.
Squidward: (screams) Mr. Krabs! There's a strange sound coming from the restroom! (cut back to Sandy)
Sandy: Hmm, now only his mouth is missing.
Plankton: Shut it down. (Sandy pushes a lever to have SpongeBob's mouth disappear from the Krusty Krab. Cut back to Mr. Krabs headed into the Krusty Krab bathroom)
Mr.Krabs: (sniffs the bathroom and holds nose) For crying out loud, Squidward, what the heck is wrong with you? (cut back to SpongeBob, who has more connectors in him)
Sandy: Test three. (pulls the lever and SpongeBob disappears. Cut to Squidward who is holding a few trays of food)
Squidward: I cannot believe I have to deliver all this junk food myself. (slips on a Krabby Patty and falls) What the...? (SpongeBob taps Squidward and hands him some new food trays) Oh, thank you. (SpongeBob's lower body is there but not his head. Squidward screams and Mr. Krabs turns up his radio music. Cut back to SpongeBob)
SpongeBob: Look, no hands or feet. (laughs)
Sandy: Well, we're getting closer. (SpongeBob has more connectors in him now) Goggles!
Plankton: Shall we activate it together?
Sandy: Why, sure enough. Three...
Plankton: Two...
Sandy: One!
Plankton: (jumps on the red button) Fire! (Sandy presses the red button, squishing Plankton) Ow. (cut to Squidward as SpongeBob's entire body appears on Squidward's head)
SpongeBob: Ooh, I gotta go to the bathroom. (disappears as Mr. Krabs walks by)
Mr.Krabs: (smells the air) Neptune's trousers, Squidward, maybe you should just lay off the broccoli for a while. (cut back to SpongeBob appearing in the lab)
Sandy: (picks up SpongeBob) It worked! We transported his whole body this time.
Plankton: Yes! My plan worked! And now I have no further use for you two goody-goodies. (presses a button,forcing a cage surrounding Sandy and SpongeBob) Using your technology, I shall teleport myself directly to the Krusty Krab, and the Krabby Patty formula... (sings) will be mine. (laughs evilly and telports himself)
SpongeBob: Oh, no, Plankton has finally won. And we-- we helped him.
Sandy: Not exactly, lab partner. (presses a button to raise the cage. Presses the other button to make the formula appear)
SpongeBob: (picks up the formula) The Krabby Patty formula! But if that's here, where's Plankton? (cuts to Plankton)
Plankton: Fools! I played them like a 32-bit synthesizer. (laughs and turns on the flashlight) Now where is that formula? (He looks around and his flashlight goes off) The formula is gone? (yells but is barely heard from the safe inside Mr. Krabs' office)
Mr. Krabs: Do you hear something?
Squidward: Don't hear a thing but something stinks. I know I hear something. (cut back to Sandy)
Sandy: Aw, I knew Plankton was hatching an evil plan the whole time. So I just adjusted the controls to put Plankton where he can't do any harm. Nobody fools a squirrel from Texas. (laughs evilly)
End