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The Bad Guy Club for Villains



Episode Info | Pictures
Typed By: ssj4gogita4

(at Patrick's Rock where he is sitting watching TV. SpongeBob enters)
SpongeBob: Patrick, guess what came in the mail today!
Patrick: Oh, what?
SpongeBob: This... (shows a 'Mermaidman and Barnacleboy Lost Episode VHS tape)
Patrick: Mermaidman and Barnacleboy lost episode? Stick it in! (SpongeBob puts the video tape in the TV and presses a button. Both giggle excitedly)
Chorus: Faster then light! Prepared to stop crime! It's Mermaidman and Barnacleboy!
SpongeBob & Patrick: Yeah!
Chorus: If your in a jam, It's Mermaidman and Barnacleboy!
TV Narrator: The Adventures Of Mermaidman And Barnacleboy! Tonight's Episode: "The Secret Meeting!" (Gets a shot of the mermalair) Deep in the Mer Cave, something strange takes Mermaidman's attention.
Barnacleboy: The Dirty Bubble? What's he doing at the bus stop?
Mermaidman: Looks like he's got a one-way ticket to Bikini Bottom. And there's only one thing he could be up to in Bikini Bottom, Barnacleboy!
Barnacleboy: That's right... Mermaidman!
Mermaidman & Barnacleboy: Evil! (cut to The Dirty Bubble getting off the bus, laughing evilly. ManRay appears)
TV Narrator: The terrible ManRay!
Dirty Bubble: Ha! So glad you could make it! (chuckles)
ManRay: I wouldn't miss this for the world, Dirty! (cackles)
TV Narrator: (Jumbo Shrimp appears) The most powerful of all crustaceans, it's Jumbo Shrimp! (a young Atomic Flounder appears) It's the Atomic Flounder! The abomination of a nuclear experiment gone horribly wrong! (a giant slug comes from beneath the sewers) And the terror of the sewers, the man eating Sinister Slug!
Dirty Bubble: We join forces at last.
Mermaidman: It's worse than i could have imagined. A teamup.
Dirty Bubble: Welcome to the B.G.A.T.F.B.C. (hands everyone cards. Everyone laughs evilly. Mermaidman uses binoculars to zoom in on the cards)
Mermaidman: April 3rd, 12:00 noon? That's tomorrow!
Barnacleboy: Holy... (static)
Patrick: Hey!
SpongeBob: (laughs nervously) Don't worry. I can fix it. (pushes a button and the tape has been eaten by the VCR. SpongeBob uses tape and scissors to put tape back together)
Barnacleboy: Griping guppies, Mermaidman! We got to do something!
Mermaidman: Not so fast, little flipper. We're far too outmanned! But fear not, I'm always one step ahead of evil.
TV Narrator: Our hero of the brine puts on an urgent call.
Mermaidman: To the ocean's greatest heroes! (woman on phone mumbles) Yes, I can hold.
TV Narrator: Meanwhile, a sinister horde congregates outside Hotel Evil!
Dirty Bubble: Right this way, gentlemen!
Jumbo Shrimp: Hey, what's going on in here?
Dirty Bubble: Huh? Oh, I'm dreadfully sorry gentlemen, you must be in the wrong room. This room is reserved for the B.G.A.T.F.B.C.
Mermaidman: (in an overcoat and hat) That's funny. I thought it was aside for the I.J.L.S.A.
Dirty Bubble: I.J.L.S.A? What in coral caverns is that? (Mermaidman and Barnacleboy takes off their hats)
Bad Guys: Mermaidman and Barnacleboy!?
Mermaidman: That's right! Now, before you have to say good-bye, say hello to some friends! (throws a tornado through the doors and in comes a hero) The Elastic Waistband!
Barnacleboy: Greet the hottest crime fighter in the country. (pours out some coffee) Professor Magma!
Professor Magma: (Speaks weird language)
Mermaidman: The illusive Miss Appear! (she appears out of nowhere) And The Pyrite Panderer with his hairnet of knowledge!
Pyrite Panderer: Do we really exist?
Mermaidman: Together, we are… The International Justice Lodge Of Super Acquaintances!
Dirty Bubble: Let's get ‘em boys! (Mermaidman and Jumbo Shrimp fight with Jumbo Shrimp getting the upper hand)
Jumbo Shrimp: Do not tussle with the B.G.A.T.F.B.C. (Mermaidman gets tossed to the wall)
Pyrite Panderer: Violence resolves nothing.
ManRay: (to Elastic Waistband) Good night, balloon boy! (chuckles as Miss Appear appears and takes away ManRay's gun)
Miss Appear: Professor Magma, catch! (throws the gun at him. It melts when he gets a hold of it)
Barnacleboy: Step aside, you copious cod! My beef is with The Bubble.
Mermaidman: Careful, Barnacleboy. He's got nuclear touch!
Atomic Flounder: (launches at Barnacleboy, touching his left shoulder)
Barnacleboy: Nuclear touch! (SpongeBob and Patrick whimper)
Patrick: I can't watch! (covers his eyes but then his eyes poke through his hands. Barnacleboy's shoulder grows an arm and it punches him in the Hand Creature)
Mermaidman: Fracturing furniture! Hang tight buddy! (Mermaidman leaps into the air. Dirty Bubble swallows ManRay then spits him out, into the air at Mermaidman. The Elastic Waistband jumps up and enlarges his belly to stop ManRay) Hang in there, my daring deputy. (a Hand Creature grows out of the hand)
Hand Creature: Your daring deputy is napping right now! But I'd be happy to pass along the message if he ever wakes up, that is. (the Hand Creature tries to use Barnacleboy to hit Mermaidman)
Mermaidman: Swirling Shrimp! That fiend has taken control over Barnacleboy!
Elastic Waistband: What do we do, Mermaidman?
Mermaidman: I'm glad you asked. (Mermaidman swings off the chandelier and does multiple flips as he talks) I believe that if The Atomic Flounder were to touch that wretched growth, it would cause a chain reaction, reversing the polarity, and the molecular level, restoring Barnacleboy to his natural state. Does that sound about right, Professor Magma?
Hand Creature: You'll never do it! You don't have the moxie.
Mermaidman: That's what you think, cur. (he picks up Hand Creature and runs with him) Shield. (Professor Magma turns into a shield. The Atomic Flounder is thrown on the ground. Mermaidman laughs as The Sinister Slug crawls up the wall behind him)
SpongeBob: Look out, Mermaidman! (Mermaidman looks behind him as The Sinister Slug spits some slime at him. He dodges it and it hits The Atomic Flounder)
SpongeBob and Patrick: Yay! (Atomic Flounder has trouble moving)
Mermaidman: The Sinister Slug's slime has got you stationary and stiff, which means your time is up, friend.
(He pushes Hand Creature toward Atomic Flounder fin)
Hand Creature: Not Nuclear Touuuch! (Hand Creature disappears)
Barnacleboy: Great gravy, what just happened?
Mermaidman: Il'l tell you about it later. Now let's take out the trash.
Pyrite Panderer: Please, utilize my hairnet of knowledge for this endeavor.
Mermaidman: Thank You Panderer.
Dirty Bubble: No! No, you guys don't understand! It's not what you think. (The Bad Guys Club gets swept up in the hairnet of knowledge)
Mermaidman: You really thought you were going to get away with it, didn't you? Fess up, villains. What's the B.G.A.T.F.B.C.?
ManRay: It stands for the Bad Guys All Together For Book Club!
Mermaidman: Book Club? You mean you weren't going to destroy a library or something?
ManRay: Why would we do that? Wer'e almost to the new chapter.
Atomic Flounder: What are you going to do, lock us up for reading?
Jumbo Shrimp: Yeah. You can't prison us for reading.
Mermaidman: That's right. Remember, kids, no one can imprison you for reading. ("THE END")
Patrick: Hey, what happened? Why are those squiggles on the screen?
SpongeBob: Those are called end credits, Patrick.
Patrick: End credits?! But I don't want it to end!
SpongeBob: That's why Neptune gave us the rewind button. (pushes the rewind button)
Patrick: Thank you, Neptune!
End